The Official Writing Challenge
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Do fire ants migrate? Maybe if Texans were nicer to them, they wouldn't move to Georgia. Good account of dancing to fireants.
Very nice conversational tone. You might try combining some of your shorter sentences so it flows a little more smoothly, but this is a fun piece. I'm a Texan, too, and can totally relate to this. Love the last sentence.
OH, NO! We've had reports of fire ants being seen here in Australia. I must remember: Run for the hose... but, we're in a drought. We're not allowed to use the hose.
I visualized each of these scenes clearly and enjoyed a chuckle (along with a wince at the thought of the pain). Thankyou.
Funny piece--puts meaning to ants in your pants!
One of the best things about this is its "second person" style--very unique, and hard to pull off. This was quite effective.
I guess I won't be booking a flight to Texas any time soon. If the only thing that works is high pressure water you might want to tell your local Chamber of Commerce to advertise wet spells. Thanks for the advice.

You might want to visit us up here in the north east all we have are gnats and the're only annoying.

Keep on writing about the local color.
As a fellow Texan, oh, can I relate to this! We actually have a "Fire-Ant Festival" in our little city
(sponsored by Amdro). We figure if we can't lick 'em, we'll at least make the best of our situation. Thanks for the laugh!
Oh my, that was funny. I thought the ants were bad where I live.