The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 1271 times
Member Comments
I salute your originality! Good writing! Good story! Your dialog crisp, sharp and engaging! One small let down though, your ending could have had more of a punch! Overall very good piece! Keep writing!
Very original take on the prompt "fire-fighters"! I bet you place!
Very creative and original. Kept me going from begining to end! LOL, had me a bit jealous that I didn't not think of something like that :o)
Unique, and smartly written.
Excellent story and very original! I definitely enjoyed reading this!
VERY well-written! You have some FABULOUS, memorable lines in here - including the last! Don't imagine you'll be a beginner long!!
I so enjoyed this. My only suggestion would be to show us the meeting getting broken up and the people taken away. I realize word count is a big problem, but it would have added that missing punch at the end. Good story!
Pretty good stuff, and I agree with Donna. Another point, I felt the tease for the set up came a little late, but again, constrained by word count that is understandable. A good introspective essay, I particularly liked the way you handled the rumor.
Pretty engaging, good overall. There should have been a little more 'show' than 'tell' to grab the reader and make them feel the same emotions that Luicus did-just a suggestion. Creative name for the MC!
Another good one. Love the play on words too. I see a theme in what you write. Have you considered doing a long story about something like this? I bet you'd do well.