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| TITLE: Portent | Writing Challenge By Beth LaBuff 04/17/13 | ~ 5th Place  LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE SEND A PRIVATE COMMENT ADD TO MY FAVORITES |
| Member Comments | ||
| Member | Date | |
| Laura Hawbaker | 04/19/13 | |
| Interesting take on the topic. The first paragraph seemed so busy you had me wondering where you were going with everything, but you did a great (and humerous) job of pulling it all together. One sentence tripped me up. "After feeling lethargic yesterday, last evening..." I found yesterday juxtaposed to last evening a bit confusing. Maybe I was just reading too fast, but it did awkward. | ||
| Laura Hawbaker | 04/19/13 | |
| Oopps! Apparently I was typing too fast too. I meant to say, that sentence seemed a bit awkward. Otherwise, good job! I also like the title--very fitting. | ||
| Christina Banks | 04/20/13 | |
| What an interesting idea for the topic. I wondered what kind of rash he was going to have. | ||
| Christina Banks | 04/20/13 | |
| What an interesting idea for the topic. I wondered what kind of rash he was going to have. | ||
| Alicia Renkema | 04/24/13 | |
| Fabulous writing, you had me on the edge of my seat. Was any of this based on a true story? I can be gullible but we are living in not only the information age, but one where they are discovering new things about the different way people live all the time. Plus, there are all these different tribal societies, I remember reading "The End of the Spear" and how little was known about them as a people and their way of doing things. Anyway, it was pure genius, I thought to have this man on your show and you having just found out you had the chicken pox and all only to shake his hand ... Wham, he sneezes -- wonderful job. I really enjoyed this a lot. | ||
| Judith Gayle Smith Vitouswykegardiner | 04/25/13 | |
| Turnabout is fair play. This is excellent. | ||
| Margaret Kearley | 04/25/13 | |
| Oh I love this Beth, fantastic. Many congratulations on your well deserved placing. I love the humour of this! What happened next!! (Have just read last week's too - I am a little behind-times - many congrats on that too. Fantastic!) | ||
| Loren T. Lowery | 04/25/13 | |
| Portent: one of my favorite words from one of my favorite writers. Loved the way you rounded and corralled this story to make it so enjoyable. And, the azure sky with popcorn clouds? What can I say, but superb. Congratulations on your EC, Beth. | ||
| Christina Banks | 04/25/13 | |
| Congratulations on your EC, Beth! | ||
Verna Cole Mitchell  | 04/25/13 | |
| Congratulations, dear friend. I knew this was wonderful and am so proud of your EC rating! | ||
| Alicia Renkema | 04/25/13 | |
| Congrats on this well deserved win! As I told you, I love this and it looks like I had a lot of company. Love your writing girl, have a fabulous day in Jesus. | ||
| Yvonne Blake | 04/25/13 | |
| Great job on pulling us in for that sneeze all over everybody! Congratulations! | ||
| Alicia Renkema | 04/26/13 | |
| WOW -- 5th over all! This was an amazing piece, your writing is just sooo good. I am so happy for your writing achievement and for our friendship. His joy to you always. | ||
| Cheryl Harrison | 04/26/13 | |
| You had me all the way through. I wasn't sure where it would end up. Thought maybe it was and end-of-the world virus brought over by the island native. All of that suspense and it was the chicken-pox and a sneeze. Good job! Congrats on your placing. | ||
| Charla Diehl | 04/26/13 | |
| Beth, congrats on placing 5 in the EC list and for the "highly commended" nod for this interesting story. If a tribe/person like this does exist, I hope the media never finds out. They would exploit it for all its worth, and their simple, innocent existence would be ruined forever. But we'd need to get Bibles to them in their own language--if we knew it---okay, now I'm over-thinking this whole piece. And that's a compliment to your writing. | ||
