TITLE: The Blood of Innocence (chapter 7) By Suzanne Snosavenski 11/30/06 |
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Chapter Seven
He decided to head down another part of town, and see if he could find a night club where no one knew him. Three months had gone by since he set fire to Jessica’s house. So he decided to get out for awhile and maybe he would be lucky and run into her. He parked in one of the side street of the downtown area where all the shops and nightclubs were and decided to walk a little ways. He’d heard about some night clubs down on Sanford and Broadway, but he had to walk down Central to get there. On Central they had a lot of stores, dress shops, antique shops, and a craft shop and so on.
Something caught his eye when he walked by a little antique shop. First he thought he was seeing things. ‘It couldn’t be that easy’ he thought as he stared into the store and watched Jessica filling out something. How he wanted to go inside and end her life so she wouldn’t be able to tease any one else anymore? But he knew he had to wait, wait until she came out and then follow her. He decided to go across the street,, down a ways from the antique shop and into a little café; where he found a table near the window and watched for Jessica to come out.
He sat down and looked out the window, when a short heavy set middle age woman walked up to his table to get his order. He ordered a soda, the waitress then left only to return a few minutes later with his drink. He hardly looked at her, because he was glued to the window.
“Thanks.” Was all he said when she set the drink in front of him. She did ask him if he wanted anything else, but he just shook his head.
It seemed like an hour went by and still no sign of Jessica coming out of the store.
“I know she didn’t see me. So why is she taking so long?” He thought. He waited another fifteen minutes before he decided to head out.
He paid for his drink and went back across the street. On his way toward the antique shop he saw two police cars heading his way. He turned and saw another one. He took off running in the direction of his parked car, jumping over parked vehicles and into an underground parking garage with the police close behind. He hurried and found his car, which was unlocked and windows down; he jumped through the window and ducked down.
As he hid down he could hear the radio’s from the police cars, so he knew to stay hidden. It seemed like forever before Daniel felt safe enough to sit up. When the coast was clear, Daniel couldn’t wait to get out of there. “How did they know I was here?” He was still sure Jessica hadn’t seen him. “She had to have seen me, to have called the police on me.” He started up his car even though it sounded so loud in the parking garage; he eased it out carefully watching to see if the police was still around. Once out of the garage he headed back to his place.
It took Fred a little longer than two hours to gather all the stuff for the girls. He gathered about four different style wigs, and some glasses. Fred had a police woman help him pick out some clothes that would fit them, since Jessica gave him their sizes.
He was so grateful because he was terrible at picking out women’s clothing, and Officer Shelby was the same age as Jessica and Dianne. She was very helpful; Fred couldn’t have done any of it without her. They found about three outfits for each woman and decided that they would do for now. Fred decided to ask the captain if he could take some money out of petty-cash to buy them the things they needed; he agreed.
Fred arrived at the doorsteps with several bags in hands ringing the door bell. Tom answered the door and let Fred in. He looked around and saw Dianne but didn’t see Jessica anywhere.
“Where’s Jessica?” Fred asked still looking for her.
“She’s in her room; she has been a little upset over everything.” Dianne told him. Tom greeted Fred and offered him a seat, even though he was starting to feel a little jealous toward the young detective. Fred then handed Dianne the three bags.
“Our disguises I take it?” She peeked into the bag. “Let me go get Jessica, she needs to come out of that room.” She then sat the bags down and went upstairs. While she was gone Tom and Fred managed to exchange a few words.
“So Detective, I heard that your officers almost had that guy, but lost him?”
“Yes, unfortunately that is true. But we will get him. In fact we have an undercover police woman posing as a prostitute to try and lure him in. So you see we are working on every angle to get this nut caught.” Just then they heard a female voice as the girls walked into the room, which made them both look up.
“I certainly hope so; I don’t know how much more I can take.” Jessica eyes were red and puffy from crying. But she still looked good no matter how bad she felt. Tom watched as she approached and from the corner of his eye he observed Fred staring at Jessica with the same look he himself had displayed so many times. He wasn’t sure but he thought he saw a receptive glance in Jessica’s eyes directed at this young man. Or was his imagination playing tricks on him? He sure was praying that it was his imagination.
“I’m sorry Jessica; I can imagine how you must feel. It’s like you’re the victim being locked up, while the perp gets to roam around free. But until we catch that guy, you’re going to have to stay in hiding and in disguise.”
Jessica wrinkled up her nose at that idea, and then she took the four wigs out of the bag. She decided to take the short brunette wig with bangs, since it was the opposite of her long blond hair and bangs. She got up with the wig and went into the hall bathroom to put it on.
Dianne watched Fred watch Jessica as she headed toward the bathroom. Dianne knew that look; she saw it in Tom’s eyes. Fred was starting to have feelings for Jessica, but her heart was still with Hank; that Dianne knew for sure. Yet if Jessica could choose between Tom and Fred, Dianne hoped it would be Tom. Even though Fred seemed like a nice guy he wasn’t a Christian. She decided to pray about it and let God be in control of whoever Jessica was to be with. It may not be either one of them. She tried to listen to what Tom and Fred were saying but they were talking pretty low. But they both stopped when they heard the bathroom door open and a dark short hair brunette Jessica walked in. She looked good in any color or length of haircuts; she had the complexion for it. “I like the blond but not bad,” Tom said while unable to keep his eyes off her. Fred nodded his approval.
“Oh I don’t know I kind of like brunettes, it really is becoming on you Jessica,” he said.
“Well do you think he would know it’s me? Or would this look better?” She then pulled out a pair of glasses out of her pocket and put them on.
“Jess that would even fool your mother with that get-up; maybe even a dark shade of lipstick would go well with the dark hair.”
“I think you’re right. Dark lipstick does usually suit brunettes huh?” Dianne nodded. “But I don’t have any dark shades.”
“Hold on I think I do.” Dianne started digging through her purse, and then pulled out a tube of lipstick. She opened it and showed it to Jessica. Jessica smiled and took it from Dianne along with a pocket mirror and applied the lipstick right there. Tom, Fred and even Dianne stood there with their mouths wide opened. They couldn’t believe how a wig, glasses and a dark shade of lipstick could change someone’s appearance so much it didn’t look like the same person.
“Wow what a change! If I passed you on a street and knew you for years I wouldn’t recognize you.” Fred was astonished at Jessica’s transformation.
“I have to agree Jessica; you do not look like you. That guy would never recognize you.” Tom added. Tom saw something in the way Jessica looked at Fred. He already saw the way Fred looked at her, with that same desire for her that he felt. But he prayed that it wasn’t a lustful desire, knowing that he wasn’t a Christian and right now neither was Jessica. But he has been praying for her to be saved. Tom decided that if Fred was her choice then he would start praying for his salvation also, even though he did anyway because Tom’s heart was so big that he didn’t want to know that anyone was burning in hell, when he could have had a chance to save their soul.
“I have an idea, since I will be off in a couple of hours, how about trying out your new get-up and have dinner with me? That is if you want to?” Fred asked.
Tom couldn’t help but feel that pang of jealousy in the pit of his stomach, knowing how he felt about Jessica. In his mind he kept saying say no, say no Jessica, but she smiled and said, “Yes thank you I would love that.” She liked Fred. He was good looking and in some ways he reminded her of Hank.
Truth be told Jessica really would have rather gone out with Tom; she felt the chemistry, or so she thought until she looked his way and saw him smile and nodding his approval. How could she have mistaken his Godly kindness, for something else? Her heart was with Tom, but she just wanted to show her appreciation for everything Fred was doing for them. Since being a new Christian and on fire; she had been praying more than she had done in her life time. “Lord help me to guard my heart and not let it get broken. I know it hasn’t been that long since Hank was killed. But things are working so fast in my heart for Tom. I feel he doesn’t think of me in the same way as I do but considers me just as a friend. Lay it in his heart Lord that it is alright to love again. You are showing me that right now. Thank you Lord. Amen”
“Good, I will be back by to pick you up at 7:00.” When he spoke she hadn’t realized that she was praying while staring into Fred’s eyes.
“I hope he isn’t getting the wrong impression,” she thought as Fred then looked at his watch. “Well I have got to get back to work and do some paperwork, so I won’t be late. See you then.” He turned and went out the door with the girls and Tom saying goodbye as he walked out to his car.
Tom closed the door and turned to Jessica and smiled but deep down he was so miserable and he didn’t want to show just how bad he felt about her dating this man.
“He seems like a nice man, and with him being a cop you will be in good hands. But all the same I will keep your safety in prayer.”
“Why thank you Tom that is so sweet of you.” But she knew in her heart that she only wanted to go out with Tom. She smiled at him before she excused herself. “Well I guess I better go and freshen up and see what I can find to wear.”
“Okay Tom what gives?” Dianne whispered so not to be heard by Jessica.
“What are you talking about?”
“Why are you sending her off with your blessings when you definitely feel something for her?”
“Well I see how she was looking at Fred, and I can’t stop her if he is her choice now can I?” Dianne just stood there and shook her head before she replied.
“Tom I know that there is something between you two and what I am seeing right now are two very stubborn adults that won’t admit that even though it is happening fast, there is something between the two of them. I know Jessica is stubborn, I’ve known that for a long time. I see you two are very much alike, I will keep you both in prayers.”
“Please do, we could use all the prayers we can get. But Dianne it is really hard for me to be that forward, I mean I haven’t dated – not once since my wife died. I guess you can say I’m out of practice to ask anyone out, especially someone like Jessica. I’m also afraid of a rejection from her if I were to ask her out. But like I said I saw how she looked at him and vise versa.”
“Come on Tom, she was smiling and she accepted his invitation out of kindness and nothing more. But if you don’t make your move, you just might as well give her your bless…” She stopped suddenly when she heard the bedroom door open, and in walked Jessica wearing a low cut dress with sparkling sequins and flared chiffon skirt that came to her knees. The dress was short sleeve and a pastel blue with darker sequins on top. She styled the short wig to have some curls to the front, and swept it to the side held by a decorated comb. She very seldom wore eye shadow, but this time she wore light blue shadow and eye liner that she hasn’t wore in a long time. She wore blush, and the dark lipstick. She finished off the touch with long dangling rhinestone earrings and matching necklace. The 3-inch heels made her legs look longer, and her body taller. She looked like a model walking in.
“Wow Jessica, you look great, like a million bucks! Right Tom, doesn’t she look good?” Tom just stood there unable to speak, he felt like his jaw was down to the floor, because he just couldn’t seem to shut it. He was stock still with his mouth wide open until he finally found some words to utter.
“Yeah.” His voice sounded hoarse and scratchy so he cleared his throat. “Yes you look great Jessica; Fred is a very lucky man.” He just couldn’t say anymore… He then turned and walked over to the couch and grabbed his Bible off the end table to read.
“Thank you.” Jessica said with sadness in her eyes, but Tom had his back turned and didn’t notice the look on her face. All he wanted was to get into God’s word, but also to escape Jessica’s beauty. Most of all, perhaps, he wanted to escape the desire to rush over to her, hold her in his arms and not let go. But then he felt the leading of the Lord for the three of them to pray. He started waving his arms toward Dianne and Jessica motioning for them to come to where he was.
“I feel the leading from the Lord that we need to go into prayer.” Dianne immediately headed over toward Tom and took a seat close to him but not right next to him. She knew that anytime the Lord leads someone into prayer, of the blue, that it is a motion from the Lord and either something wonderful is going to happen, or someone needs prayers now for either good or bad. Jessica hesitated at first; she didn’t know if she should since she wasn’t a Christian yet – but she did believe and something was drawing her towards her friends and pray with them. Something… she just couldn’t put her finger on it; a feeling, she just didn’t know what attracted her... So, she walked over to the couch where Tom and Dianne were and sat down between them. Tom then grabbed her hand, but she jerked it away because the electric shock between them was still there, and she felt it go through her again.
“We pray in a circle and hold hands, it’s for strength,” he told her, but he felt a little hurt that she didn’t want to hold his hand. He took it all wrong, but took her hand again anyway, as well as Dianne’s. He then started praying not knowing what to pray for at first, but then the Holy Spirit took over and spoke through Tom.
“Dear Heavenly Father, we first want to say that we love you, we worship you and adore you. You know us all from the bottom of our feet to the top of our head; in fact you know the numbers of hair on our heads that is how much you know us. We are not worthy of your love, but we thank you that you loved us so much to send your only son here to die for us. How great your love is for us, thank you Lord. Lord you have us here to pray and only you know what that reason is, and you said when two or more gathered in your name, well we are three and we are gathered in your name. So what ever we are to be praying for we know will come to past, because you said it. But first we bind the devil in the attacks with Jessica and anyone that is connected to her. We cancel all assignments that the devil had planned for her, we cancel them in the name of Jesus. Thank you Jesus, praise your holy name, thank you Lord.”
Tom started praying in the spirit, shortly after Dianne followed. This was something new to Jessica, she never heard even her parents pray like that. But then while listening to the way they were praying it was almost like music to her ears, and she started getting goose bumps listening to them. Then, as quickly as they prayed in the spirit, they stopped and Tom started praying again, but this time it was different.
“I hear my people’s cries and I know their needs. Pray and have faith, for some have so little faith that it holds back the blessings that I have for them. Pray and keep praying, have faith when things look hopeless. For through faith comes hope and blessings. I have so much to give, but my people needs the faith of Abraham. He received his inheritance because of his faith and obedience. Obedience also is the way of Moses, for through his obedience my people were free from bondage. Always walk in obedience and have faith in that you can not see or touch and I will free you all from your bondage. Bondage of sin, rebellion, lust, lies, all sins, just walk close to me, ask me for strength and I will give it to you. My children time is running out, I am coming soon… saith the Lord.”
There was silence for a minute before Jessica heard Tom and Dianne with their eyes closed and head still bowed, thanking and praising God for the word. Jessica didn’t know what to think, she thought that Tom was pretending to speak for God. But something deep down inside knew that everything she heard really did come from God. She couldn’t stop getting goose bumps until she actually started shivering. She hadn’t realized that tears were streaming down her cheeks. She did know that it touched her soul deeply and that she didn’t want to burn in hell like her nightmare about Hank. She really didn’t want to go there. She wanted to be with her parents in the peaceful serenity beautiful place called heaven. It was like an eye opener; she knew exactly what she needed, but she didn’t know how to go about it. When Tom and Dianne finished giving God the praise and glory, they looked up and noticed something different in Jessica’s face, along with the tears. Tom knew that look immediately and reached out and took both of her hands in his. This time it wasn’t out of the love for a man and woman, but out of Christian love to help her save her soul.
“You want to know more about Jesus, don’t you?” She felt a lump in her throat, she was afraid that if she were to speak that she would break down in heavy sobs so she just nodded her head.
“I know you use to go to church and I know your parents have talked to you a lot about salvation, right?” She again nodded her head. “Well to make sure, I will go over the basics and then the decision is yours.”
“Okay;” was all she could utter, and that even sounded a little choked up.
“Jesus came down to earth for only one purpose, and that was to die. But it wasn’t all that simple, he had to be whipped and beaten for our transgressions, and for all of our sins, that is why he had to die for you and me so that we can have eternal peace with our heavenly Father in heaven. Jesus knew that, He knew that He had to die on that cross to take our sins with Him to that cross, to shed His blood on that cross. That is how much He loves us to do that for us. Every lash on His body was for the sins of this world. He had to suffer for us and to die for us. And then he rose after 3 days, which I knew you know the whole story.” Jessica was now sobbing; feeling so unworthy and picturing Jesus being beaten and hung on the cross with blood all around seeping from his body, His innocent blood. “But praise God He didn’t stay on that cross, or in the tomb, He is alive! Jessica our Lord lives and He wants to live inside you, to make you a new creature. To be born again of the spirit. We are just flesh and bones, but our spirit lives on for ever. When we die our body will decay, but what ever choice we make with our lives, will be where we will end up eternally, either in hell or in heaven with our Lord. All you have to do is confess with your mouth that you are a sinner, and ask Jesus to come into your heart and to forgive you of your sins. So God can put your name down in the lamb’s book of life. God gave us the freedom to choose, the devil doesn’t give us that choice, and he tries to take and to deceive people into thinking that, this is the way of life. To do your own thing, as some people think is the way of life. But God wants people to do things His way, in a Godly way, in a loving way. God is truth, love, and light, everything good. And the enemy is the opposite; he is the devil of lies, hate, darkness, and everything evil and sinful.”
Tom watched Jessica; she had her head low, and crying hard for her salvation. He didn’t know when it occurred but suddenly he saw Dianne bending over with her hand on her friends shoulder. “Jessica, do you want Jesus as your personal savior to live inside of you and to take up residence in your heart?” Jessica looked up with tears streaking her face, her mascara was running down her cheeks, and her eyes circled like raccoon eyes. She nodded that yes she did want that.
Tom looked at her and still saw a beautiful woman in spite of the washed out makeup on her face. Right then and there he wanted to put his arms around her and hug her tightly. “Just repeat after me Jessica” He then led her into the sinner’s prayer, confessing that she is a sinner, and asking for forgiveness. She then asked Jesus to come live inside her, and to help her to grow and witness to others, the love and grace that our Lord has for them. The old Jessica was dead to sin, and now the new Jessica, who just gave her life to Jesus, had been reborn to life, in Christ.
When they were finished Dianne went and gave her a hug and started crying for her friend. But it was a joyful cry, knowing that her prayers had been answered for her friend. Tom always kept a box of Kleenex on the coffee table, because ever since he gave his life over, he cried when in prayer a lot. He reached over for the box and handed it to both ladies. When Jessica finished wiping her face she noticed the black on the tissue.
“Oh I look a mess! I got to go fresh my makeup now. Fred can be here any minute.” She looked toward Tom with her black eyes and smiled, “Thank you for everything. For letting us stay here, and for being here for us. I feel like a heavy weight and burden has just been lifted off my back.
“You’re welcome and no problem, it’s been nice having company here, but you should give the Lord the ‘thanks’. But I do know what you’re saying about the heavy weight, I felt the same thing when I was saved; that heaviness is our sins. So when you give your life to Jesus, he then takes your heavy sins to the cross. But also remember being a Christian won’t be easy. God never said it would be easy, we will be persecuted for His name sake, and we will be hated for Him. We just need to know that He will be there for us, and will help us through it all. We have to be strong, and He will help us to be strong. That’s where our faith comes in; that we have the faith that Jesus will see us through it. His word is our weapon, and our weapon is the Holy Bible, read it. If you don’t have one, I think I have an extra one around here somewhere.”
“Oh thank you but Dianne gave one to me.” But then she remembered where her Bible was. “But it is at the house up in my bedroom right now.”
“Well let me see if I can find an extra one until you’re able to get to yours.”
“Thank you.” She then looked at the time. “Oh my, I better hurry and straighten up; he should be here any time now.” Tom forced a smile, and Jessica turned to go refresh her make up, but then she stopped and turned around. Which confused Tom; he wasn’t expecting what happened next. Jessica then ran up to him and gave him a big hug, which he didn’t know if he should hug her back or not. It wasn’t until he heard her whisper into his ear. “Thank you for being so caring.” He gave her a little hug back, before she let go and went into the bathroom to freshen up.
Once the door was shut, she leaned on it still feeling Tom’s body next to hers. “Come off it Jessica he’s only being nice to you because he’s a man of God, he’s nice to everyone. Why would he want someone like me who has been with men and has drank and got drunk, and doesn’t know anything about the Bible?” She wiped a tear that was starting to bead at the rim of her eye. “Fred is nice and very good looking; maybe something could happen with that relationship if it is meant to be. But only God knows.” She then continued washing her raccoon eyes and face and touched up her make-up.
Fred showed up thirty minutes later, looking and smelling like a million bucks. It made Tom feel like a bum, but he greeted him with a smile and led him inside.
“She will be ready in a minute, last minute touches. You know women?”
“Yes I do, having four sisters older than me. They were always hogging the bathroom.” Tom chuckled.
“That I wouldn’t know about; the sister part, I mean, I had only 2 brothers. But my wife used to spend hours in the bathroom.” The door to the bathroom opened and out walked Jessica. Looking at her you couldn’t tell that, minutes earlier, she had been crying. Tom could tell by the look in Fred’s eyes that he was pleased with what he saw. Tom still liked Jessica’s long flowing blond hair, but she did look very attractive in the brunette wig. She grabbed a light sweater, because the evenings had started getting a little chilly for August.
Fred was the perfect gentleman opened the car door for her, and then waited until she was seated before shutting it. Once he got inside he asked her if she had any suggestions on where she would like to eat.
“I have no idea, why don’t you surprise me?”
“Well give me an idea; what kind of food do you like?”
“Well, I like all kinds of American, I like Mexican food, and I especially love Oriental food.”
“I love Oriental food also; in fact I know just the place. You even have to sit on the floor because it is completely Oriental.”
“Great, it sounds like my kind of place.”
Jessica was nervous about being on a date, since she hadn’t dated since Hank. Also she was nervous to the point of being scared that Daniel would show up and recognize her. She did know she was in good hands being out with a police detective. But being a new believer, she was struggling with trust. She knew she had to have trust and faith in a being that she couldn’t see or touch. She had to go with her heart, and her heart knew that he would keep her safe. She remembered His words through Tom. “For through faith comes hope and blessings.” And also, “Always walk in obedience and have faith in that you can not see or touch and I will free you all from your bondage. Bondage of sin, rebellion, lust, lies, all sins, just walk close to me; ask me for strength and I will give it to you.” Jessica did something that she hadn’t done since her parent’s funeral, she prayed.
“Lord I’m new at this, which I guess I don’t have to tell you. But Lord give me peace to know that I am safe, and that that guy will not recognize me if we see him. I want to feel your presence here with me. Let me know if Fred is the one you want me to spend my life with or Tom, I am so confused. My heart feels more for Tom, but I’m not sure if I’m the right one for him and if he is the one you want me to spend my life with. Please show me, I just don’t want to spend my life alone, or with the wrong one.”
They pulled up in front of a restaurant name ‘Shanghai Wok’, which looked all decked out with a big red dragon on the billboard above the door. Looking at the building from the front a person would almost think that they were in China. It had fine details on the building, and the oriental shaped roof. Once inside she saw individual rooms from which you slide paper thin panels to open up onto little tables set very low near the floor. Chinese lanterns hung through out the building which gave it the oriental touch. The hostess greeted them graciously. She was dressed in the full costume of a geisha girl. She asked them before they followed her, to take their shoes off. Jessica and Fred both put their shoes in a numbered bin. The young hostess then gave them a card with that number on it. They then proceeded to follow the young girl to their little room. They had a seat on the floor on a couple of cushions.
After awhile Jessica finally started to relax around Fred and she was finding herself enjoying his company very much. They talked about everything except for the stalking. Their meals were served to them, and Jessica being a baby Christian almost forgot to pray blessings over the meal. She was a little shy about it, so she just bowed her head and quietly prayed to herself. They ate most of their meal in silence but only for small talks. They didn’t start the more serious conversations until after they were done and the waitress cleared off their table and brought them tea.
“So Fred, how come you never married? Was there someone you came close to, if you don’t mind my asking?”
“Oh no not at all, I was engaged once. Its just didn’t work out. She wanted her career; she was a senior flight attendant. I accepted that, she did a lot of traveling, and that we would be apart quite a bit. But she couldn’t accept my profession, not knowing if I was going to come home or if she would get a call that I was killed in the line of duty.”
“Well that wasn’t fair of her. After all there are plane crashes and her chances of being killed to me would have been the same.” Jessica took a sip of her tea, then set down the beautiful looking china and looked back into Fred’s face.
“Exactly, especially with the incident of 911, they changed her schedule at the last minute. She was scheduled for one of the flights. But to be honest, I think it was more than that. I honestly felt she was seeing someone else while she was supposed to be with me.” Jessica could tell that it hurt to talk about it. He still had feelings for his ex-girlfriend.
“How long did you know her?”
“Well I met her on a flight one day while I was transporting a prisoner. So she knew what I did for a living and visa versa. I wanted to be a cop as long as I could remember, no one was going to try and talk me out of my profession. They either take me for who I am and what I do or not at all.”
Jessica nodded her head in total agreement with what he was saying. She started looking at Fred through a different light; instead of a higher authority figure, but a person. He was a very attractive young man, with curly light brown hair. He had said he had hazel eyes, but tonight his eyes looked much greener. He had perfect white teeth, and sometimes when he smile he would give a half grin which was quite sexy. It did excite her some when he smiled at her, but she couldn’t help thinking about Tom. There was something about Tom; she just couldn’t get him out of her mind; something very deep within her which stirred her soul… And she knew that the excitement she felt while gazing into the eyes of this good looking cop was just sexual. She knew, as a new Christian, that she had to fight off the urge, and the only way to do that was to pray. It had been a while since she had been with a man in that way, the night before Hank died to be exact. But now she knew it was wrong. So she said a small prayer. ”God how do I stop having those sexual feelings toward this man? I know it’s wrong, please give me the strength to say no, I don’t want to lead this good man on. All I can think about is Tom, but yet I have a sexual desire for this man. Please help me. Fred is a nice guy, but I just don’t feel he’s the one for me. Yet these feelings that are stirring inside me are so strong I don’t know how to push them away,” she thought as she looked at the gorgeous hunk sitting across from her. But then she heard a soft quiet voice whisper in her left ear, lust. “Lust, is that me thinking or is that you Lord? Listen to your heart.” Her eyes got big, the voice was so clear, she looked around but no one was close enough to say anything to her, except for Fred. But she knew it wasn’t him. The look on Jessica’s face must have given herself away that something had just happened.
“Jessica, what is it? You look like you just seen a ghost.”
“No it’s nothing; I just thought I heard something. But I think it was just my imagination.” She might have convinced Fred that it was her imagination, but she didn’t convince herself. She knew she heard something, but what was it, who was it?
“Well I hope you don’t mind making this a short evening, but before I came to pick you up, I had a phone call, and someone called in sick, and they asked me to cover for him. And that means getting up at 3:00 in the morning. So…”
“That’s alright I understand.” It had to be of God to get her off the hook. “Thank you Lord.” She silently prayed. “Your job is very important not to be one man short. Especially when that guy is out there killing innocent women, and he’s looking to kill me too.”
“Well that’s not going to happen Jessica, believe me. We will not let that happen to you, I won’t let that happen!”
Fred spotted the waitress and waved her over to the table to pay for their meal. He handed the waitress his credit card and returned with it a few minutes later. Fred signed it, and added a pretty good size tip for her service. He then led Jessica out the door with his hand on her back. Once outside it almost caught her breath when Fred reached down and took hold of her hand and walked her to his car. He opened the car door and Jessica slid inside. He then carefully shut the door, went around and got into the drivers side. He started up the car, and backed out of the parking space. Once he was out on the street, he casually reached over and took her hand in his, while driving with his left. They were quiet all the way to Tom’s place.
“Okay Lord; help me to let him down easily. I don’t want to hurt him, but I know he is starting to feel something for me. But then Tom doesn’t show the interest in me like Fred does. Oh Lord I am so confused, please tell me what to do? I honestly believe that was you, or I think it was you that said to listen to my heart; my heart says Tom. Lord if he is meant to be with me, reveal it to me. Help me to hear your voice, and to follow you. Thank you in Jesus name Amen.” She leaned back in the seat and enjoyed the soft music as they headed back to Tom’s house.
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