TITLE: The Friendly Church
By Tracy Finney
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(A husband and wife are stood alone in the living room. They are just an average couple, nothing fancy.)
Husband: Hey honey, I’ve got a good idea.
Wife: Yeah, what is it?
Husband: Well, we haven’t been in church for a long time, and...
Wife: Yeah, it’s been six years, since our wedding.
Husband: Well, I think it’s time we go again. Besides, Sammy is always inviting me to his church.
Wife: OK. It sounds like a plan. So where do we go?
Husband: Well, your mom was Catholic, should we go there?
Wife: Uh, no. No I don’t want to go there.
Husband: How about there Baptist church? That’s where your dad goes.
Wife: Hum, no. I don’t think I want to go there.
(Pause) I know we can got to the Pentecostal church. You grew up in a Pentecostal church.
Husband: Nope, I’m never going to a Pentecostal church again. I haven’t been back there since my dad ran off with the secretary.
(They both stop and think)
Husband: I’ve got it! We’ll go to Sammy’s church. Sammy is always telling me how friendly his church is.
Wife: OK Great! When do we leave?
Husband: We’ll need to leave...
(He looks at his watch)
Husband: well, right now.
(Husband and wife leave. The stage is set up with small groups (clicks) of people. Each group is happy and talking within their own group. Occasionally someone will glance over at another click and the smile disappears from their face, until they get back involved in their group. The husband and wife appear on the scene looking a little timid and nervous about their first time to a new church. Husband spots someone from a group looking at him, he smiles and takes a step in his direction. The man quickly looks away from him. The wife sees a lady looking at her. She smiles and takes a step in her direction. The woman instantly turns away. The pastor comes in. He smiles and greats the new folks.
Pastor: Welcome welcome. My name is Pastor Jimmy. This is a great church, everyone is so friendly.
Husband: (hesitating) Um, yeah, that’s what I heard.
(Everyone sits down in their little groups. Husband and wife sit on their own. The husband and wife shift uneasily. Restlessly listening. The Pastor is stood speaking about family and loving one another. Pastor closes and leaves the stages. The groups all leave in their own clicks. The husband and wife are left alone. As they get up and start to leave their heads down and faces looking in despair, we hear the husband mumble.)
Husband: Friendly church.
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