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Previous Challenge Entry
Topic: Promises (02/09/04)

TITLE: A Mother's Promise
By Shannon Bremer
02/12/04

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A Mother’s Promise

Once there was a girl named Kate. Kate was what you could call ordinary. One night, Kate and her family were talking and decided to write, on a piece of paper, make one promise to each member of the family and sign it.


They all had to read aloud their promises. Kate promised her mom she would always be a friend to her. Her mom’s promise to Kate was that she might not be on earth forever, but, she’ll always be in her heart forever and won’t let anything happen to her. Kate’s dads promise to Kate that she maybe only eleven, but she’ll always be his little girl.


The next year, they found their promise papers one day and read them aloud again. That night on their way to a restaurant they were all singing to a song that was on the radio. When they got to the restaurant their service was good and so was their food. When they were done eating they got into their car and headed home.


As they were heading home, the same song was on as when they went to the restaurant. That very same night a drunk driver was on the road. While the song was still on, that drunk driver was about a quarter mile away from Kate’s family. When that drunk driver was close, he was falling asleep, and started going in the other lane where Kate’s family was.


Kate’s dad wasn’t quite paying attention to the road at the time. They got into a car crash and only two of them survived, that was Kate and her dad. After Kate and her dad got to the hospital they had to have checkups.


When Kate and her dad were released from the hospital, Kate said, “Can we go out for ice-cream? I can’t go home right now. I…I…I don’t know what else to do because it is just too early to go home right now.” They went out for ice-cream and talked over what good memories they had with Kate’s mom. They decided to go through their promise papers and later on they would go through Kate’s mom’s stuff.


When they got home they did just that. Kate is still sad because of that night, but she knows that her mom is in a better place now. Now Kate has ideas for stories and poems because of what happened. Sometimes Kate even sees her mom in the clouds or she simply feels that her mom is right there.


(This was writen by the 11 year old daughter of Jean Bremer)


Member Comments
Member Date
Corinne Smelker 02/16/04
You have a future as a writer! Good job - and a good way to look at the promises we make to each other in families
L.M. Lee02/16/04
What a sweet & sad story.
Mary Elder-Criss02/17/04
Shannon, I see you share your mother's gift. Thanks for your sweet story. Keep writing!
Nita Frazier02/20/04
Thia story shows a lot of promise inthis young one's talent. Keep writing.
Donna Anderson02/22/04
Nice writing, Shannon! I can feel the love you have for your parents through this! :)