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My dear Strumpet;
I read with some dismay your letter where you described how your patient has developed a penchant for attending Sunday Service at her local church. Even though she has made a commitment to the Enemy, and His Son, all is not lost! Remember, she is a mere human, not spirits like we are, work on her humanness, on the frailty of her body, and her mind.
You say she used to read her horoscopes, and listen avidly to our emissaries, the psychics? But she has now stopped because she believes it is a sin? Do not despair! We have become very subtle in the twenty-first century. If she is anything like the other females of today, she is taken up with the Internet. (What a tool for us!) Use this to your advantage, direct her attention away from good sites, and instead take her to the doom and gloom pages our IT department has created. Show her omens. Bear in mind, omens are just negative promises. It is the only way we can take the words spoken by the Enemy and turn them to our benefit. Our Creative Department is doing a wonderful job of fabricating new omens daily. Keep her mind on the bad things happening around her, and especially on those things over which she has no personal control, like the war in Iraq, or the starving masses in Africa.
The Enemy has made many promises to these brutes — why is beyond reason, and the Intelligence Department is still trying to get to the bottom of His Plan. Ensure that she is at all times too busy to read His Promises, or to hear about them from someone who is further down the road in His Enemy’s service, and who could sway her judgement.
We fail to understand what the Enemy sees in these vermin, but it seems He truly does want to bless them, and give them all the good things He says in that blasted Bible. It makes my blood boil when I think of sickly-sweet way He addresses them. Our Father Below maintains it is part of a hidden agenda, but has yet to discern what the true agenda is. In the meantime, use diversions. We expect to hear any day now how we can trump the Enemy and keep all of these humans for ourselves.
In my next missive, I want to address the promise of the elixir of eternal youth, versus the Enemy’s lie of eternal life. This has been one of the most successful tall tales we have perpetuated against females.
I remain, your affectionate aunt,
Diabolica
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In Tribute to C.S. Lewis, author of “The Screwtape Letters”.
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