I've learned to anticipate this response when I ask for a ride, "Sure Mom, but I'm a little short in gas money."
Glad to find Jeff, my college student willing to help out. I commit to contribute to his gasoline fund. I grab his arm and we proceed out the front door. (Jeff and his brothers learned long ago the chore of guiding a mom without sight).
"Be careful mom, " he warns opening the car door as it makes a loud squeal, "be sure to keep your feet back, there are wires hanging from the dash board," he explains.
"What's hitting the top of my head," I inquire trying to feel above me, "it's the lining of the roof.I need to glue it back on again."
A loud bang startles me, "what was that!" I wanted to know, "loose wire on the radio.one firm tap on the dashboard usually does the trick.
"Why does your car shake so much when we stop?" another silly question from mom.
"It's just the engine, it's having a bad day," he replies with a matter-of-fact tone.
I fight the temptation to offer a loan for another car. But I remain silent and hold on to my motto: "tough times experienced, good character expected."
"Be careful not to lean back too much, my shirts are hanging there. I just picked them up from the cleaners," he warns.
I ponder on this profound contrast. He placed such care in his appearance-nicely shaven, clean haircut and impeccably dressed with stylish clothes. However, this detailed care did not extend to his mechanically diseased vehicle which, with each turn of its bald tires, begged to be laid to rest at the nearest salvage yard.
This drastic contrast in Jeff's world pointed to a significant comparison to my own life. I too, experienced emotional malfunction as I faced the rough terrain of adversity--the devastation of my complete blindness, the agony of losing my youngest son and most recently, the burden of the loss of my husband's job.
But although the rest of my world seems to be falling apart, my commitment to seek God's face remains intact. This is the area in which I am diligent in maintaining in the best spiritual condition.
It becomes the one aspect in my life which remains constant and unwavering-my trust in almighty God. I find in Him, the security taking me beyond my circumstances and closer to the shelter of His promises.
Though an accumulation of negative circumstances creates a desperate need for emotional repair. His promises remain the constant source of hope and strength. Obedience of His Word becomes the fuel needed to reach the ultimate destination of peace and serenity.
Even when this path leading to it might be filled with bumps and unattractive detours, I feel secure knowing the Lord is in control. He already knows what's around the next corner.
Blessed by this reassurance of His provision, I toss fear and anxiety into the emotional salvage yard.
"Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name; you are mine.
2 When you pass through the waters,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze. (Isaiah 43:1-2) (NIV)