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Topic: Rejection (11/15/04)
TITLE: Are You Drowning?
By Rebecca Johnson
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“. . . Night after night I sought him whom my soul loves; I sought him but did not find him.” (Song of Songs 3:1) Hear the throbbing of my soul. What will You answer?
I pursue you. I want you. I want your breath to come in gasps when you think of meeting Me. I want your entire body to tremble when you imagine My hand touching your face. This is the way I feel about you. I want you to love Me more than you’ve ever loved anything before. I want you to fall into My ocean of love and drown. Beloved, I want you.
GASP! Oh, my Jesus, how can You say such things? . . . To me?
I want you to swallow when you hear Me whisper your name. I want you to run up to Me, throw yourself at My feet, and sob until you think the world will end. Then I want you to show Me your heart. I want you to let Me have it, let Me tear it out of you, let Me pierce it with a thousand arrows and wound it with My sword. And I want you to say no word against Me. I want you to abandon your heart’s dearest desire, here, on this alter before Me and slay it. I want you to know, favored one, that I will watch, but I will not stop you.
Oh, my Father, don’t! Don’t go on! If I had known . . . When I said I’d follow You anywhere, when I said I’d give anything just to be with You, when I begged and pleaded with You to take me as Your own . . . Oh! I didn’t know! I never knew You’d do this to me.
I adore you. On the day you were born, I laughed. A light came into My eyes, and I smiled down at you and said, “This one will be special, enchanting. This one will fascinate My world.”
But . . . Oh, why do I fight? I am overcome. You are GOD. My God calls. My soul is delirious with the thought. I must go to Him. Where is He? Where is this One my heart pounds for? Where can I go that I might be with Him? What can I do that I might bring a smile to His face?
I became Man because I loved you. I set down My Eternity and clothed Myself with mortality. I did this so that one day I could hold you in My arms. Does that make your heart skip a beat? It was a beautiful surprise for you. What a shock! To find a King dressed in rags! To watch as the Creator was flogged with a whip. Do not hide your eyes away, My love. I did it for you. I did it so I could redeem you, so I could purchase you with My blood, so I could set you free from your prison and chains. I did this because I love you. Do you love Me?
Dearest Lord . . . You take my breath away. I cannot define the depths of Your love - no more than I could define the limits of space. You love me beyond the realm of my emotions, beyond the castles I built of my dreams. I long just to sit at Your feet, bowled over by the glory of Your Presence. My heart pounds to hear just an echo of Your beautiful voice. These words of mine are such poor substitutes for the ravaging love You now pour over me. I am drowning. I am drowning in You. May I never go back to breathing air again. I want You, most holy Lord. You! My Love, sweetest Love . . . I am drowning. I am falling in love.
I love you too.