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Previous Challenge Entry
Topic: Rejection (11/15/04)

TITLE: The Angry Rebel
By Mark Magill
11/15/04

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In a schoolyard in southern California, a dozen 5th graders stood in line to enter the classroom... it was early in the morning, and the teacher had not arrived. The kids grew restless.
One dark-haired boy named Hugh, spread his arms, looked into the sky and said: "Isn't it amazing and wonderful how God created the world and everything in it?" A blond-haired boy grew angry, pointed his finger at Hugh and said: "What, you think that some 'god' waved a magic wand and 'proof' there was the universe? HA!" Hugh looked at the boy with disbelief, and his eyes were filled with tears.

10 years later, the blond-haired young man was driving toward the south gate of a military base, somewhere in North Dakota. As he approached the dark-haired guard, he turned his radio off and rolled down the window. After the guard let him pass, the young man suddenly remembered a young boy named Hugh. He hung his head in shame and whispered words of repentance. Suddenly, an overwhelming feeling of peace and unspeakable joy entered into his heart... and he was very happy. For he had once rejected the very thought of God's existance, but now that was all beginning to fade away... to be replaced by the truth.

"So from now on we regard no one from a worldly point of view. Though we once regarded Christ in this way, we do so no longer." 2 Corinthians 5:16


Member Comments
Member Date
Delores McCarter11/22/04
This was very good. The plot was concise and engaging. There is only one thing I want to point out. Think about your character description a bit more. Describing the via their hair color detracked from the flow of the story. Other than that one thing, I thought it was a great story.
Kathleen Shelton11/22/04
Mark, I too, diagree about the hair coloring being distracting. Nice, gentle reminder that we influence and touch more people than what our eyes perceive.-Kathleen
Deborah Anderson11/23/04
A lot said with few words. Thank you for sharing this. God bless you.
Linda Germain 11/28/04
Mark, after reading your bio, just wondering if you are a blond by any chance? :0) Your point is WELL set in starkness and brevity. "Fluff" would have diluted your message. Very well done. ~LG~