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Previous Challenge Entry
Topic: Pride (04/12/04)

TITLE: Humoring Pride
By Linda Germain
04/18/04

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My dad was an impressive looking fellow. At just under 6’5”, wearing his handsome cowboy hat, and with that long legged John Wayne way of walking, he was a sight to behold.

He never imbibed or smoked or used coarse language, but was the life of any party, from birthday to Tupperware. When a current event became a hot topic in the local paper, out came his pen to express an opinion to the editor. His efforts were phrased in poetry. Most of it was tongue-in-cheek hilarious.

In the South, we say he was “full of himself.” His best material came straight out of his daily activities. When I was twelve, he married a smart and kind lady who was the perfect Edith to his Archie-ness. She was a very intelligent and capable nurse at work, but once at home, she was the source of endless good-natured kidding. She says she loved being his main character.

She readily admitted domestic endeavors were not her forte, especially cooking. This was his green light to use the old standby about supper being ready when the smoke alarm went off. Often, this was true. He loved to tell people about the terrific socks she had knit for him. “They turned out just great,” he bragged, “except they were a little snug under the arms.”

His new pair of trousers was too long so his faithful and supportive “Edith” assured him, yes, she knew how to shorten them and they would look just fine. Not really knowing how that process worked, it seemed most feasible to her to cut them off above the cuffs, then cut off another few inches, then sew the cuffs back on. That way, she reasoned, they looked so tailored.

Dad worked in land real estate. He had a client who wanted to walk over several acres of some property with him to check on boundaries. Dapper in his Stetson and every inch the expert, Dad happily tramped around the available acreage with the interested buyer.

For some reason, he happened to look down at his shoes .He could hardly believe what he saw. To his utter amazement, his cuffs had fallen off! Never having been in this exact predicament before, he did the only thing he could think of, which was to reach down, pick them up, put them in his pocket and keep walking. He felt no need to explain.

False pride can get in the way of a genuine witness. A good insight full of humor neutralizes embarrassment and awkwardness. Taking things in stride shows a confidence that is very attractive. None of us are exempt from stumbles, bumbles, falters, trips, or slips. Generally, our response reflects an obvious level of understanding and maturity.

Dad believed there was no need to have a heart attack over every little misstep in the human bungle-jungle. Some events are merely little blips on life’s screen and do not require a full-blown CPR code- blue.

Many considered my merry father and his spousal sidekick a great source of comedic relief. Their sensible counsel to stop fretting over every hangnail and blooper could put things squarely in perspective.

Once, when I should have zigged my spiffy yellow Lemans, I zagged instead, and received a noticeable dent from a car that tried desperately to avoid this jarring encounter. I called home, crying and blubbering the details. Dad’s calm, soothing comment was, “Well, as you know, life is just full of little problems. It is only a car. You’re safe. It can be fixed. What’s for supper?”

One Sunday, while passing the collection plate at Church, Mr. “ usually unruffled” became a little discomfited when he touched his face and realized he had forgotten to shave. On many occasions, but not this one, he used an electric razor as he tootled down the road, singing Tennessee Ernie Ford hymns. He claimed it saved time.

Up and down, back and forth he went. Up close and personal to the whole congregation, he had concern that he resembled a boxcar hobo. Scripture says pride goes before the fall. Dad could barely tell the punch line to this true story without breaking himself up laughing at this revealing picture of his own importance in God’s work.

When he returned to the counting place to take stock of the flock offerings, he felt something strange hanging out of the sleeve of his coat. Since his bride had yet to discover anti-static sheets for the dryer, it could have been worse. What he pulled out was a black sock. Not shaving wasn’t even in the same league with wearing footwear on your wrist as you discharged your parish collection duty. He put it in his ever-ready pocket, and swallowing giggles, returned to the service.

Healthy pride in our appearance, our homes, our children, and our heroes can be a positive. The pride that is drawn from conceit, arrogance, vanity, or an over estimation of our great piety may color the ability to cope with the silliness of most real life situations. Perhaps there would be less need to treat stress and depression if up-coming generations learned the art of picking up the cuffs and socks from misplaced efforts and putting them where they belong, in God’s pocket.

The Lord called this giant of a man home. For days before departure, he contacted friends and family to bid them farewell, then with mortal business done, died with dignity and class, happily expecting to see Jesus face to face. He knew what was important in the scheme of earthly things of no lasting consequence. At the same time, he was blessed with an inborn ability to defuse the pride of self-righteousness, anger, condensation or patronage with his special brand of humor.

Even now, it never fails. When we bump into folks who were touched by him, they begin laughing, eager to share a story. They usually start the conversation with, “Remember when he…?”


Member Comments
Member Date
Corinne Smelker04/19/04
Laugh out loud funny! When ARE you going to write the book? It will be a best seller- guaranteed.

Good job, Linda, I like the fresh look at a topic that could become extremely stale.
Maree Paton04/19/04
Great story!It held a bit of everything: humor, inspiration, a great perspective on what is really important. What an incredible man!
L.M. Lee04/20/04
how very blessed to have this family heritage.
Glenn A. Hascall04/20/04
Gotta love those folks that have a story for every occassion. What we attempt in writing they were able to do off the cuff (pun intended).

He sounds like an incredible man. Thanks for sharing.
Caroline Alderson04/21/04
Very funny! I like the wearing footwear on his wrist, and the cuffs falling off, and he just picks them up and puts them in his pocket. No need to explain. Those parts made me laugh.
Leticia Caroccio04/21/04
Lol! Hilarious and poignant. I wish I was blessed to have known him. Reminds me of a story of my mom crossing 5th Avenue in Manhattan. She felt herself almost trip on something around her ankles. To her horror it was her skirt. She, wearing a black slip, picked up her skirt and quickly put it in her handbag. We still laugh at this today. Loved your story. I'm tempted to give you my vote. Great job.
Linda Germain 04/21/04
Funny about your mom's skirt! Dad's wife went downtown Boston wearing two hats...These folks put things in perspective don't they?
B Price04/24/04
You were blessed to have parents that brought laugher, and then stood back and admire it.
YOU folks made me think of my dear husband. maybe we are kin. LOL
Yes, False pride can get in the way as we witness.
Cherish those moments when someone starts out "“Remember when he…?”
for that are memories of your dad that are priceless. GOD needed that extra comedic relief
up in heaven when HE called your dad home. Thanks for sharing this great story with us.
And Praise GOD there are men in this world that can let down thier hair and totally enjoy life.
They are special in thier own breed.
GOD Bless
.
Corinne Smelker04/26/04
Congratulations to:

Clotilde Martines
Michael Aubrecht
Linda Germain

And congrats to BPRice for placing 5th!

Linda - you've been in the top 3 so many times - you truly are a winner!!
Linda Germain 09/24/04
Note: I MEANT condenscension, NOT condensation! LOL Afer all, he was not steam or vapor. :0)


   
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