The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
04/30/09
Great insight to the comforts we take for granted. You painted a realistic picture of this mission trip and I enjoyed the journey.
05/02/09
First of all: great title:) Loved the connection with the necklace bookending the story, and the ending was perfect. Well done!
05/02/09
Highly appealing title and a sharp and effective contrast between the spoiled girls and the needy locals.
I have a mission team coming out here in June and we're planning to spend a few nights in one of the African villages. One of the concerns that has already been raised has to do with rats. So I think your premis is entirely consistent.
I love the last line - really shows the changes the trip made in her. And the tile rocks!
05/04/09
I've seen this type of transformation take place over and over again with the brief exposure to missions in developing countries--especially the "I'm no longer comfortable" type response. The soft becomes harder to take when one has perspective. great job!
05/04/09
I love this! Laughed out loud in several places but wow - what a message. Love it all, from the clever title to the impactful last sentence. A truly wonderful entry.
Great detail, wonderful message. Loved the touches of humor.
A wonderful take on the topic. I really liked this piece. You painted a great picture of the place / circumstances, threw in just the right amount of humor and blended it all into a great message. Well done!
05/04/09
I liked the descriptions and the MC in this piece.

Just a small note: it's = contraction for it is. If you want the possessive, then use its (no apostrophe).

Great title and humor in this story.
05/05/09
To say this was good seems so trite. I enjoyed it. It reminded me of my week in Nicaragua, and my return home.
You wrapped your message inside a wonderful story. The MC's heart was shown so well throughout by her words.
Great job.
Loved this and seeing how the Lord transformed the heart of the MC as she experienced what others did not have.
Isn't it sad the things we take for granted that are "luxuries" to other countries? This was a great piece. I especially loved this line:

“Don’t worry. I heard these rats want to Tri Deltas, not Kappas.”

Funny line, but it did not take away from the serious message of this story. Thanks for sharing, Kristen.