The Official Writing Challenge
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Fabulous, until the edning. I kinda wished you let the audience discover what happened, instead of being told. I felt that you hit the nail on the head with the topic. And it was such a fun and interesting read. To top it off, very well written!
05/19/06
Dragnet revisited. Good for you. Nice job.
05/21/06
Nice pace...nice writing. I loved the added little details and the way you told the story.
05/22/06
This was a very interesting read. I like the way you set the scene of the rich wasting or winning lots of money, while not too far off there were hungry kids sharing a sandwich. A nice touch at the end when you said tomorrow you would bring two sandwiches.
05/23/06
This was actually a pretty good thing. I was really worried at the Dum-da-dum-dum part.... coulda done without that. And I think a couple fewer entries would have strengthened it a little. But aside from that, I enjoyed the read. This was a polished and fun piece!
This was a good story and it was well written. I liked the "tomorrow I'll bring 2 sandwiches" line. It was a soft touch of hope without a miraculous "taking them home and adopting them" Polyanna feel. Good job.
05/24/06
This was really pretty good stuff; in contrast to others, I liked the ending.
One of my sons worked in Vegas for two years - for Sears - the only time he went to the strip was when folks visited and he dropped them off.
05/24/06
I really liked the gentle wit in this piece.
This is easy to read and fun to read! A mailman feels like a benevolent public servant....someone I'd like to listen to.

It seems you switch verb tense in the paragraph beginning, "I picked up one sandwich..." which threw me a little bit.

I like the ending - the compassion and hope that can come with a couple of sandwiches. :-)



05/25/06
This is a great entry! I tend to agree that the end was a bit of a let down (not the message) but up until then the reader was allowed to experience the events.I did ,however, feel that the last line was perfect! "Tommorow I will bring two sandwiches"
I could totally hear the voice on the old Dragnet radio shows when I read this! How fun! Good job.