The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 988 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
04/13/06
Interesting story. I liked the bit about the tape-recorder, and playing on a woman's in-born maternal insticts.
Okay, to be perfectly honest, this is a really wierd story. True, it's very creative. It would have given even more of a punch if we could have really gotten a taste of the fear the MC presumably had. I too, like the part about the baby crying.
04/13/06
This confused me. I didn't really get the point. I also felt like you told the whole thing, and the reader wasn't drawn into it. It read almost like a newspaper article. That said, it was a very unique idea. (Perhaps I should re-read it.)
God bless.
I was also a bit confused. But it was an interesting tale, no doubt.
04/14/06
I understand it better on second reading, and it deserved a second reading (the 4th paragraph still gives me some trouble though). Powerful writing.
04/15/06
I think there is a huge amount of symbolism in this, woven throughout the piece ... although I can't say that I truly 'get it' all. Like, what did Adam do to get sent there in the first place? How did he come to have the tape player and everything, and know the barn and all? Anyhow, the message of 'fulfilment' comes through loud and clear. It is masterfully written. Well done.
04/15/06
Strange, "different", off the wall, unusual, foreign, odd...just some of the adjectives I thought of as I read this tale of...woe? I sure didn't find any "Fulfillment" here. The Author did not research prisons - as there are no weapons allowed within the walls of a prison. ("men with the butts of their rifles stood aside") but all kidding aside...this is probably a neat story for those who understand it. Good Luck.
04/17/06
I applaud your creativity! This reminds me a bit of Richard Condon's story "The Most Dangerous Game," only with a far more satisfying ending.
This was very unique. I think it told too much and showed too little. I didn't understand all the symbolism. The MC went from prisoner, to hunted, to a new man. I am guessing it is a parallel for salvation. Good, but I think it needs development so that we care more about the character and feel his emotions.