The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
04/11/19
Hahahahahahaha!

I loved the "witty close."
Great job with the Bible story of King David and Goliath!

This was a great approach to the topic, it had lots of humor, wit, and a powerful message all rolled up into a wonderful entry!

Thanks for making me smile and laugh...

Blessings~
What a fun read- love the ending lines!
04/15/19
You broke nearly all the rules, but I still really like it.
Maybe it's BECAUSE you broke the rules. :)

The key ingredient: your undeniable wit.
Go Bro!
This is a delightful read. The pacing is perfect. I felt like I was right there watching it all unfold. Your delightful sense of humor had me grinning and chuckling throughout. Although poetry isn't my thing, I was throughly entertained with this piece. I just noticed a couple of tiny things: the editor in me cringed at had got instead of had gotten, but I totally understand that had got is the UK way. The other tiny thing (again a stylistic approach in poetry) is the number of exclamation points. Your words and pacing are so spot on, you don't need that many in my opinion. The ending was great too. You nailed the topic in a fresh and delightful way.
Congratulations on ranking 11th overall! Happy Dance!