The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Your character development is outstanding. I love the way you put the MC in his place.
So well done, dialogue, plot, and conclusion.

God bless~
Very good story and great point. I enjoyed it.

Just a few comments from my point of view. Of course this is my perspective on it and I might be full of hot air.

The first part of the story to me had too many adjectives. Kind of like salt and pepper, use sparingly.

After you salted it with extra adjectives it left me with a wonderful taste in my mouth.

Is "Smilingly" a word. Would "Smiling" comma....been better?

I am just expressing how I felt, hope you accept this with grace. It was a great read.
Thank you.I welcome and very much appreciate all comments.
Supurbly written tale of willful ignorance at an attempt for Truth to pierce a hard heart.
Great ending and congratulations.