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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 4 – Masters)
Topic: Digital Detox (04/24/14)

TITLE: An Ode To Technology (Or Not...)
By Joanne Sher
04/28/14


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I've been around technology
for thirty years or more.
I loved me my Atari games
and cable channels (four).

I got my first computer
in 1987.
An IBM 286:
my DOS-run PC heaven.

I didn't get a cell phone
til 1999,
and though it weighed 900 pounds,
it suited me just fine.

Back in the last millennium,
technology was fun.
A nice and quick diversion
for when the day was done.

But these days electronics
are more than just a break.
They link us to the outside world
each moment we're awake.

We get our news and share our thoughts
from Main Street to Bombay.
Our memos travel fast as light:
we cannot get away.

So every week or so these days,
I turn off my PC.
No smart phone, tablet, or Ipod:
I make my day tech-free.

Instead, I write in longhand,
and read a paper book.
I take a walk, play with my kids,
clean dirt in every nook.

It's something I look forward to:
my digital time out.
It helps my brain to take a break;
my eyes to not pop out.

I come back feeling more refreshed.
It almost never fails -
despite the fact I may return
to ninety-eight emails.

Don't get me wrong, I've no desire
to toss my screens away.
But tech fasts here, a screen break there,
has kept my hair less gray.

Though desert islands have appeal -
the peace could be perfection -
I doubt I'd last three days or more
with no wi-fi connection!

(this is MOSTLY nonfiction - with a bit of license)


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This article has been read 335 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Lisa Johnson 05/01/14
Poetry perfection... the rhyme spot on and the flow was smooth and easy. The message right on topic. Good job!
George Parler 05/02/14
A poem of technology is no easy task, but you make it look effortless. A planned break is not a bad idea. Good rhythm and great writing. :-)
Margaret Kearley 05/02/14
Great poem this, I love it. Excellent rhyming, scanning - and many a smile! Excellent.
Joe Moreland05/02/14
You certainly haven't lost your touch. This was a delightful read. The pace was pretty close to perfect, it was right on topic and you've mastered the ability to put together impactful verses without having to use what my aunt used to call "$3 words".

This poem was wonderfully simplistically complicated.
Marty Wellington 05/02/14
Very nice - fun and enjoyable read - kept my attention and definitely could relate. Terrific piece!
Verna Cole Mitchell 05/03/14
Your poem is right on topic and delightful all the way through!
Graham Insley 05/04/14
What an excellent double sided ode; it sang a valid love song while at the same time explaining the need for time out.

It is so hard with poetry to give valid critiques and I am not qualified to do so. However, I stumbled a few times with syllable count; rhythm. Of course, that could just be me and mixtures of rhythm sometimes do throw me off.

The flow and rhyme made it an enjoyable read with a great message.

Blessings.
Robert Douglas Brown05/04/14
This is a wonderful poem full of wit and wisdom! I enjoyed reading it very much. It makes you want to read it again & again for the pure enjoyment it provides.
CD Swanson 05/04/14
Loved the comment about the cell phone weighing about nine hundred pounds. I recall my first back in 1995, and it was about one thousand pounds!

Great job

God bless~
Linda Buskirk05/06/14
Very cute - very real! This was fun to read.
Maura J. Merrigan05/07/14
What a fun read, I loved it! I enjoy writing this style, you did it so cleverly well and humorous! Its true those first cells weighed 900 pounds!
Tracy Nunes 05/08/14
Congratulations Joanne! I'm in awe of this. I wish I could do that!
Leola Ogle 05/08/14
Congratulations, dear Joanne! So pleased for you! God bless!
Margaret Kearley 05/08/14
Many many congratulations Joanne - this so deserved to win. A really great poem.
Lillian Rhoades 05/08/14
Congratulations, Joanne! First place after a long hiatus is quite impressive.
:-)
Catrina Bradley 05/08/14
Congratulations!!! What FUN poem about something you take very seriously. Well done. :)
Gerald Shuler 05/08/14
This poem really caught my eye
for all the truth within...
Technology still baffles me!
Congratulations, Friend!
Ellen Carr 05/08/14
Congratulations Joanne! A well-deserved win for this great poem.
Verna Cole Mitchell 05/09/14
Congratulations and welcome back to a new, wonderful return. I already knew I loved this creative poem, but I'm thrilled to see you sitting on top of EC!
Sheldon Bass 05/10/14
Great to see you back in the challenge! Congrats! You did a fine job.
Pauline Carruthers 05/11/14
congratulations on a very very worthy win. This poem had a lovely flow and a great message. Beautifully written too.
Bea Edwards 05/14/14
Yay for you!
and
I'm going to try the fast from technology per your creatively crafted advise.
Yvonne Blake 05/17/14
Yay, JO!

This category fit you perfectly. The poem flowed easily over my tongue, with humor and seriousness coming through loud and strong. Well done!
Sara Harricharan 05/28/14
Teehee! I love the light and easy flow of this. It's so true what a difference a little time away can make, huh? I loved the humor in here, glad I finally got to read it. Great job, JJ!! (and congrats! <3 )
Tracy Nunes 06/23/14
Congratulations Joanne! A much deserved win!
Pam Ford Davis 06/27/14
Congratulations!
Continued Blessings upon you, your family and ministry....

Wing His Words
Jacob Gibson07/13/14
Hi Joanne! Thank you very much for reading and critiquing my song. I found your advice helpful and I do know what stresses are (even though I didn't know what they were called) and I'll keep working on the verses.

Anyway... I love this poem! It's funny, true, and an important reminder to turn off your gadgets now and then to spend some time in the real world. Flowed perfectly. No complaints!