"...And the lived happily ever after."
Or did they?
*cue dramatic music*
Everything started out just fine in Happily Ever After Land, but soon, things began to change. Could it really stay perfect?
After all, Goldilocks damaged property, and was a trespassing thief. Hansel and Gretel trespassed too. And the three pigs? Murder, or perhaps attempted murder, depending on which version you read and believe.
Snow White and Prince Charming started out happily. The seven dwarfs were a handful, especially Grumpy, but they got along well. That is until Prince Charming made an apple pie for Snow White for her birthday. She filed for divorce the same day, citing irreconcilable differences and attempted murder.
Cinderella and her Prince Charming also started out infatuated with each other. Then one night, Prince Charming stayed out past midnight. They are still together, but things haven't been the same since. When I say "still together" I mean that Cinderella was so worried that she handcuffed Prince Charming to herself so she could keep an eye on him. So while they are indeed together, tempers have been flaring. Prince Charming keeps trying to bribe the mice into chewing through the chain.
What about Belle and her beast turned prince? Well, they had their troubles too. First she found her copy of "The Boy Who Cried Wolf" was missing. Then she found gobs of hair in the bathroom drain. It wasn't hers. She began to question whether his transformation was the real thing. He questioned whether she trusted him. It's been a rather, well... hairy situation, you see.
Ariel, also know as The Little Mermaid, started spending more and more time in the bath. And the hot tub, and the swimming pool, and any other source of water. She even accused Prince Eric of murdering their pet fish. Ariel just hasn't been herself, and she's been yelling at Prince Eric so much she's gone horse. He said he enjoyed the silence.
Aladdin has let the whole prince thing go to his head. He keeps making demands of Jasmine that she just can't fulfill. Last week he asked for complete sovereignty over Happily Ever After Land.
Who am I, and how do I know all this, you ask? Well, it's simple, really. I'm the editor of the Fairyland Enquirer, the most popular celebrity gossip magazine in the entire universe. Or at least in Happily Ever After Land.
And they lived not so happily ever after.
Was this truly the end? I mean, THE end?
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