The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
04/11/13
This is so sad. I could feel the grief through your words. I thought you may be describing a suicide or an accidental drug overdose. And the last line, 'I don't even know if I'll see you in heaven' is haunting. I hope this isn't a personal account.
Wow this is so powerful. I could feel the pain of the MC. You said so much in so few words. This is beautiful yet hauntingly sad.
04/17/13
The pain the MC was experiencing was palpable, and suffocating. This story leaped off the page, and gripped my heart.

It sounds like a suicide...and the last line was gut wrenching.

Excellent job describing the torment, and anguish. I pray that this is not a true story. If so, my heart goes out to you.

God bless~
Congratulations on ranking 25 overall!