The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
09/08/12
I totally enjoyed the market trek with you. You did great, even though I gazed too long at the chocolate bar in your next to the last stanza. Thank you for getting me through the temptations AND your last line is triumphant!
This is a great story within a poem. You expressed yourself so eloquently while simultaneously tackling the topic with the tongue in cheek humor that I enjoy.

I will admit the last line caused me to stumble a bit. I wasn't sure if she was dieting for a man or if it was God's strength that helped her through the temptation. But it could just be my tired fuzzy brain.

I think you did a great job of writing on topic and creating a character that many of us can relate to. Nice job.