The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
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Date
07/14/11
Oooh, this is top notch writing! Your descriptions perfectly match the era in which your story is set. A sad tale, with a somewhat sad ending, it leaves the reader wanting more. (that's a good thing)
07/14/11
Nicely developed plot. A few sentence structure errors. Loved the title and the sense of intrigued that kept me reading right to a super ending.
07/15/11
Amazingly well done! Vivid descriptions of emotions usually so difficult to relate. Haunting.
07/16/11
Spectacular!! Brilliantly written and paced, with an ending that surprised me and left me smiling. I've been where Brita was, but I left. And yes, my father DID blame me. I can feel her pain and her relief.
07/19/11
Loved the relentless buildup to your surprise twist at the close. Very skilfully done.
07/21/11
God will make a way when there seems to be no way is the message I'm getting here. Very well written.
Congratulations for placing 10th in Masters and 15 overall!

How sad that this story is too true for too many. You did an outstanding job of being the voice for the many victims of domestic warfare