The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
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Date
03/05/09
You did a good job of exposing and describing this very real problem. I noticed a few mis-used words, like "passed" instead of "past" that you might try to watch out for in the future. Other than that, this was a well written entry.
03/05/09
I am sorry... the mis-used words were in some one else's entry. That means yours was even better than I thought.
03/06/09
The emotion in this story was very real.
03/07/09
1980? No way! For some reason I thought this had taken place long ago. Wow. Even more heart-wrenching to know that this was happening as I played as a safe and loved little girl.
03/07/09
Wow! This is so well written… exquisitely worded details, and a heart-breaking message. You've adequately conveyed the helplessness felt by the doctor.
03/08/09
Thought-provoking title, and compelling and sad story of the state in China even now.
well done. It was a very moving story.
03/09/09
This was very well done. I have a hard time believing the fate of girl babies in China, but yet it is so. Great entry.
03/10/09
This is written very well...it took my breath away when I realized what was happening. Excellent job with the topic.
So heartbreaking.
03/10/09
'We will decide what to do next.' This article was simply heartbreaking. My only suggestion would be that the last paragraph seemed rushed in its formatting, probably could have been several paragraphs. But, wow, what a heart wrenching article.
This is a tragic story that you share. It's so hard to believe, yet you sure made it very real.
Good writing.

This is embarrassing but I found the word 'buttocks' was distracting, especially since you used it twice.