The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 2607 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
02/12/09
This was superb. I love the wit of the MC ("lucky chicken" made me laugh out loud). The humor was mixed masterfully with the tender ending. Awesome.
02/12/09
Very good story—looks like the "great unwashed" have something important to tell the well-educated agnostic after all!
02/14/09
The MC in this piece has a great voice.
02/14/09
Excellent characterization and message. Powerful.
02/17/09
I'm with your MC. I would have wanted to study from a cubicle also. Chicken soup? Are you sure? Great story - wonderful descriptions......amazing.
02/17/09
I like the juxtaposition between "advanced" and primitive--using ipods and computers from a cubicle to study people lacks the human touch, which the MC needs to truly understand his subject...and his real need: to set aside his agnosticism and trust in a simple gift of love. Well done!
Excellent writing. Honestly, I'm grateful that I will be in advanced...Your writing is just too good! :)
Having studied that same general area, I loved the creative approach you used to tell about the country and its people. There are so many levels to the story, and you excelled at all of them.
Jan, this is an excellent piece of writing. I'm left with a sense of wonder once again... :-)
02/18/09
I've been in his shoes with the "lucky chicken' thing. This is funny and touching, Jan. I like that you came at this story from a perspective other than the missionary, yet wove the Christian POV in through a lovely example of kindness. Totally unique.
02/18/09
Oh! I've been wanting to be in this chicken's place, for sure. But anyway- love this piece. And there certainly is something universally comforting about chicken soup. Lovely writing as always.
02/18/09
Your MC's voice was so authentic - I loved the grumbling and questions amid the translating. Great piece with a nice, surprising ending.
Excellent as always, Jan! I loved the background of the chicken woven into it. From the boy at the beginning and the MC's disgust and pity now "beautiful" older lady offering the comforting chicken soup in His name. Hmmm... maybe even a shadowing of Christ's sacrifice? Or am I reading into it?
Love your title. A beautiful telling of a highly detailed piece. : )
02/19/09
Wow, so vivid...way to draw in the reader. Excellent writing.
Amazing how many details, facts, emotions, insights, and beliefs you were able to weave into 750 words! Oh yeah, and several smiles too :)
Congratulations, Jan!
This is amazing. I love the voice of the MC and I always love your humor in your writing Jan! :0) Congratulations!Yor pieces move me to inspiration. Now, if I can just get my creative juices flowing ahead of time and not the night before or two hours before deadline. (Unfortuanately, I have many stories that didn't flow until the last minute so they remain quiet expressions of the heart.):0)
God bless ya hon!
02/19/09
I felt that I was somehow cheated out of the rest of the story....and yet the ending does come to a satisfying conclusion as one can assume that he changes his perspective and finds Christ. Definitely one that makes you think!
Of course, a first place win is not a surprise when it comes from the amazing Jan Ackerson!
02/25/09
Awesome writing! I was caught up in the story from start to finish. Congratulations on a brilliant first place.
I love how this educated MC learned something from one of the poor villagers that he didnt think very highly of. Great lesson in this.