The Official Writing Challenge
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05/29/08
Nicely done! I love when kids unknowingly teach their parents... happens to me all the time.

Wondering about one thing "It must’ve been one of “those” jokes, too, because Mom whacked him."... if they were in their room how would they know this?.. maybe I missed or misread something there.

Very creative and well-written!
05/29/08
And "ouch" moment that should be shared with all grownups. Well done.
I could just see those little girls pretending to be "grown-up" and their play-acting that shamed Uncle Brad. Good job.
05/31/08
A compelling story that really packed a punch. Well done.
06/01/08
Good lesson...for everybody. I felt like I was there--well done.
Ooooh! Very realistic and convicting. I could definitely relate to the play acting. My cousins and I played out family situations quite often!
06/01/08
This was a charming story. Who couldn't relate...and most of us to both sides! I'm betting that Uncle John had let a few of those D-bombs go since he threw no stones! Loved it.
Hehe, touche'! Funny story with a good point. I thought the "It must’ve been one of “those” jokes, too" line was funny.
06/01/08
Thanks for opening this box full of memories. It was very entertaining and great for the topic. I cracked up on the use of toilet paper for "stuffing." LOL. Well done!
06/02/08
A lot of memorable moments there, for both the kids and their parents.
06/02/08
I could just picture every pirceless moment!

I'd recommend that you lead with the stuff in your second paragraph. The intro of family relationships isn't the strongest hook, and doesn't really move the story along. And maybe a more original title? Because this charming story really deserves to be read--I loved it!
I was very glad the girls didn't get in trouble, it sounds like everyone learned a lesson that night.

Your dialog-the acting-was perfect.

This was fun to read. I'm smiling-thanks.
06/02/08
This struck me as being sort of sad, lol. Good job with the kids characterization, it was definitely real and I could relate to the game of 'grown-ups'. Nice job!
06/02/08
Great dialogue. Really enjoyable.
A very good lesson for parents reminding them to set the proper example for their kids. Thank you for sharing this story. It was a fun read.
06/03/08
Your opening story is so cute...I could see it all from your writing. Your lesson in the second part of your entry is very good. Ya gotta love these childhood memories! Great work.
This is just so, so real. I could see it all unfolding as if I were there. You captured the voice and the young emotions perfectly; and as an aside, I liked the ending in that it shows how we can learn certain lessons in very unsuspecting ways.
Oops. I guess the grown ups were taught a lesson. This is charming and an entertaining read.
06/04/08
Oh, wow! This story is a hoot and carries a great message, too. Love the way you describe the cousins playing "grown-ups". It sure brought back memories of my cousin visits, too.
I'm sure the parents didn't expect their words to come back and bite them LOL. Loved the girls dressing up - it must be a universal thing for little girls to stuff toilet paper or tissues up shirts. Great story, loved every line :-)
06/05/08
Great job Cheri,

The parents reaction to the fashion show was absolutely classic. The title was great and the ending was perfect!

Great message for some of us parents that sometimes let things "slip" around our beloved little sponges :).

Most excellent!