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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 4 – Masters)
Topic: Uncles/Aunts (04/17/08)

TITLE: Ants or Aunts
By Yvonne Blake
04/23/08


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(to be read aloud)

Way up north, in the far corner of our country, there lives a strange breed of folk. Their speech throws you back to a time when language had more rhythm and rhyme, not normally sounding like you and me. You wonder if it’s still English.

They say they’re headin’ downeast, but on the map it looks more north to me. And speaking of north, they drop the “r” and call it “nawth”, putting that “r” at the end of “potater”. They laughed at me when I told them that Ant Donna from the South was planning to visit me soon.

“Ya mean yer Awnt Donner is coming t’visit you. She don’t have six legs!”

Now, you must know that Ant Donna…I mean Awnt Donner…is a city girl, not caring for a hike in the woods. She dusts off a rock before taking a rest and screams at dragonflies and moths. I love her to death, but it’s so much fun to laugh behind her back when squeals and shivers and shudders at the things we see everyday.

We showed the pond, where the salamanders live, and the coop where the chickens lay their eggs. We showed her the cows, of course taking the path that led to the back pasture lot. Ant Donna…I mean Awnt Donner…was hot and needed to pause to take in the view of the farm. She inspected the log before sitting down and waved her hat back and forth.

As a small trail of black dots climbed to attack the monster that trampled their nest, my neighbor poked my side and whispered, “I can tell yer Awnt Donner is a flatlander, t’sit on an anthill like that. Oooooh, those bites are shor goin’ t’ smawt. A’nt yer goin’ t’tell yer Awnt Donner that a warsh of cold watah would feel wicked good, to ease the sting of them ants?”

I thought I had learned this strange type of talking, but I looked at my neighbor with a silly blank look on my face. The sounds bounced around in my head for a minute. I know he expected an answer from me. But I couldn’t make heads or tails of the words he had spoken. Which was the “Ant” or the “Awnt” ?

I’m sure they don’t speak English up here!


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This article has been read 1039 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Sunny Loomis 04/24/08
Made me laugh. And it's so true.
Thanks.
Peter Stone04/24/08
Priceless! And the alliteration in the third last paragraph as the ants attacked the awnt was delightful.
Sara Harricharan 04/25/08
Lol! Too funny! I felt a bit sorry for Awnt Donner. I loved the last lines though-and especially how the Ants came 'round in the end to meet the Aunt. Cute. ^_^
Laury Hubrich 04/26/08
Very funny!
Beth LaBuff 04/26/08
Cute, fun, and cre-aw-tive!... I was reading it aloud (in my head). :)
Patty Wysong04/26/08
I just KNEW this had to be about Downeast!! I STILL say awnt, but I tollerate being called Ant Patty. LoL I loved this, and I could very clearly hear this, accent and all. Great idea(r)! I loved it! LoL
Joanne Sher 04/26/08
Just delightful and fun! Great last line especially.
Lynda Schultz 04/28/08
On the east coast of Canada, the natives do to "awnt" thing too—always makes me chuckle, just like your story did.
Jan Ackerson 04/28/08
I'm always delighted with word play, regional speech, linguistics--so this just tickled me to death. Love it, love it, love it!
Joshua Janoski04/28/08
The accent in this story is the centerpiece. I enjoyed reading this aloud.

Thank you for sharing! :)
Sharlyn Guthrie04/28/08
Very cute! I hope we don't all end up speaking TV English. THat would be boring, indeed!
Chely Roach04/28/08
This was very cute...loved the drawl. Hee hee!
Willena Flewelling 04/29/08
This was a real treat! It reminds me of the difference between my stepfather and the rest of our family. And he was only 1200 miles from "home"... For those who know Canadian geography, he was from New Brunswick, and we were near Toronto Ontario. A world of difference!
Debbie Wistrom04/29/08
Wonderful tale, crative and fun, thanks for sharing it with us.
Dee Yoder 04/29/08
Love the dialect and the fun nature of this story! It takes a listening ear to get those speech patterns down in words this well!
Jan Ackerson 05/25/08
Yvonne, I'm going to feature this charming piece on the Front Page showcase for the week of June 16. Look for it on the FW home page, and congratulations!
Beth LaBuff 06/16/08
It's great seeing this fun piece on the homepage. Congrats, Vonnie, on being the FW frontpage showcase author.
Joanne Sher 06/17/08
Can I EVER tell you had fun writing this :) Congrats on your showcase, darlin'. All fun!
Verna Cole Mitchell 06/17/08
I missed this week's challenge while I was on vacation. I'm so glad it earned an honored place. I absolutely love it. It's "chawming."
Joy Faire Stewart06/21/08
Congratulations on your showcase. This was a delight and I can see why you're a "Master."