The Official Writing Challenge
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As I read your story I could see every movement and expression on Millie's and Jack's face. Beautiful story:)
Liked the ending!
'Major tense shift' - I had to read it twice to find it!!
Reading it twice, of course, was a pleasure, because this is gentle, tender and beautiful. I hope my legs still stir my husband when we've been married 67 years.
Reading this story was like watching a movie. I could both see and hear the wonderful details so clearly. “She pushes herself slowly upward with an oof and shuffles…” “Her reading glasses perch low on her nose.” “…her face squints with each jab…” The line about her shapely legs was really cute, and I laughed when she called him an “old poop.” His asking her for a five-letter word was a great way to end this piece. I really enjoyed this very sweet story.
This was a wonderful story, very artfully done. Fresh description and a sauntering pace made me feel right there in the livingroom with them. In fact, I was sitting on that sofa! Yikes! You sent me to the dictionary, too, by the way. This is done like a Master. I congratulate you and will look for you when the prizes are handed out!
This is soooo sweet & so masterfully done! I can feel the love this old couple has for each other. Great job in description, dialogue & creating feelings.
I loved this tender glimpse into this loving relationship. I almost felt like an evesdropper into the privacy of their lives - sooo well written and well crafted.
The characters were very real and likeable. The puzzle touches added so much to make this story enjoyable. Bravo!
Old habits die hard, no matter why they are formed. Good story.
What a wonderful slice of life story. I could just see this couple. Loved the dialogue, too. Thumbs up.
Comfortable, and with a neat touch of humor. Enjoyed it very much.
So tender and believable. Nice job!
Just lovely - what a neat job of characterization and storytelling. I fell in love with both characters.
Endearing characterization! You story put a smile on my face and tears in my eyes.

I always enjoy your stories and I have missed reading them!
Beautiful! I loved reading this!
What a sweet story! I loved your characters and could feel myself in the setting. Left a good feeling with me---the thought of being together into old age and still discovering things about each other. Beautiful, as always, Jan.
I love this wonderfully crafted story. (We print out the crossword every day from the paper so my husband has one, and I have one, too!) I delighted in how you showed their joy in each others company. It was a nice touch, too, to show that he still appreciated looking at her legs. Now that's one special husband!
Hehe "You old poop, I'm not done." I love that line. It sounds just like an older couple interacting. You caught the emotions well. Great job.
In a word, dear Jan, 'exquisite'! Absolutely exquisite! How DO you do it?!
Oooh, I loved this. Your words really painted pictures with this one. Awesome!
I don't know what I could add but wanted to say this was tremendous, sweet, tender, and everything I aspire to convey when I write. Excellent!!
Great job showing the action and emotions of the characters. Great ending.
Very fun! I love the interaction between the couple and especially the dialouge (I like that "old poop" line too.) Millie was my fave character. ^_^ Great job!

This is a great story and you are a great writer. Your work inspires me as a new writer. The best was that he loved the looks of his wife's legs.

In Jesus' Name,

So very well done! CONGRATULATIONS!!!!! :)
I just love the written word. This will paint a different picture for each reader. Thank's for the nostalgia.