The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 1715 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
Wow. This brought me to tears. Having had a foster child myself, I understand this. Thank you.
05/05/06
Wow, what a touching story. It brought me to tears, too. You had me hanging on every word.
GOOOOOOD JOBBBBBBBBB!!!1 Very impressed. Great story, held my interest throughout (a very difficult thing to achieve) Written very well and great message.
05/06/06
I'm just slightly cross with you ... my own fault, really ... because I'm reading this in a semi-public place and am not happy to find myself crying. My sister is adopted and I can't imagine life without her or her children who I love dearly. Thank you.
Exquisite! Beeeyootifully executed buildup to a stellar ending. Please pardon me while I replenish my Kleenex box.
05/07/06
BOO HOO!!! What a wondeful sad story!! My kind of story with a geat ending!!:) I loved how your had the nurse say what she did. Well delivered and paced all the way through.:)
05/08/06
I agree, lovely piece and the nurse was a great touch.
Ooooo, the ending was perfect. I love it!
05/09/06
You surprised me. I thought for sure that she was going to keep the baby but I like it better your way.
Well done. I got a little confused along the way early on, but the end was powerful. This is a beautiful story.
05/09/06
This is wonderful! The ending is exquisite.
I really liked the idea of your story, but think it would have been better to name both Laura and the nurse earlier on. :)
05/09/06
So beautifully written to the last word! A story of love's painful sacrifice. Great job. Jo
Well written, very touching story. Good job.
05/09/06
You've woven a beautiful story, Pat. I might rework the beginning a bit - I was slightly confused for a moment but that could be because it's 5:30 A.M. LOL. You touched on very real emotions and I loved the connection with the nurse. Very well done!
Pat, could you wring our hearts just a little bit more than you have already done? Excellent 'seeing' from Lara's eyes. You already said in your hint that this was a little bumpy, but it could be smoothed up and be an excellent piece for Sanctity of Life Sunday.
05/09/06
I think that adoption is a wonderful thing if a mother can't care for her child herself. They love their children enough to give them a good start in life. This is a very touching account.
05/10/06
Touching and moving portrait of the bravery of this mom. Love the way you brought the nurse into play.
Beautiful writing!!