The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
07/22/10
Well done.

I felt like I read an entire book in under 750 words!

You had everything a story requires, and I was locked in suspense and emotion.

I absolutely loved it!

I stumbled on one minor point:

(A guard prodded one woman who slumped with his gun and threatened, “If you don’t want to be shot, stand.”) It almost sounded as if the woman slumped with the gun.

However, the entire piece was brilliantly done. I was hooked from the very first sentence, and loved it to the very end.

This is such a heart wrenching story. The world needs authors like you so that we will never forget what happened.
07/27/10
This was a well-written story. Your characters were real and I could feel their pain. Great ending.
Wow! So many great stories. I think this one had so much emotion, written tightly. I almost feel sorry for the judges picking a winner in our division.
Congratulations for placing in the top 15 of your level and in the top 30 overall.