The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
05/30/08
I loved the way this "summer adventure" began. The Samantha / Sami transition was fun. Your story is very heart-warming and your title is perfect for this cousin reunion.
Fun story! I had a neighbor girl who also didn't have any play clothes. After spalshing around in our creek and woods, we'd have to wash her clothes before sending her home! I was a little confused whether the aunt was Sami's mom or another aunt, otherwise good job!
06/01/08
This is fun, engaging and entertaining. Just a delight to read from title to end. Well done!
Delightful! Thanks for sharing this "tween" story.
06/01/08
A delightful read, with lovely well-developed (LOL no pun intended) characters and wonderful descriptions. Enjoyed this a lot!
i just loved this story! Nikki and Sami are my kind of girls and remind me a lot of my best friend and I when we were kids. The dialogue was perfect for these two tweeners and their love for each other very touching. A well written story, great job Marita!
I enjoyed this very much. The ace bandage thing added a nice bit of humor to the story and gave it a good ending.
06/02/08
This made me grin--I love the word "snort-laughs."

There wer a few times when you started a sentence with -ing verbs where some tweaking is in order. Send me an e-mail or a PM if you want more details.

Really entertaining story--thank you!
Ooh, so cute! I'm glad that Nikki and Sami have each other. I felt sad for Sami at the end, but glad that she had someone like Nikki to be with her-and of course, the whole idea of an ace bandage had me in stitches! ROFL! Great job! ^_^
So many of your small details brought this story to life for me.

Not sure why the tears toward the end,,,,

We all could you a two week adventure like this!!
06/03/08
That was cute! Very well done.
You made the girls so real. The whole story was a warm,fuzzy from the past. I loved it.
06/04/08
Absolutely delightful!
This was a delightful read. I loved your descriptions about disecting the chocolate refreshment, and the chocolate teeth grin. I loved the private and special relationship the two girls shared, how Samantha became Sami, and enjoyed some childish freedom. Nice job! Blessings, Cheri
06/04/08
You hooked your readers right from the beginning with the girls excitement about her cousin coming. What I liked about the contrast in the counsins is that they were accepting of each other. Well done. Incredible dialogue. I promise you, all your female readers laughed hard over the "ace bandage."
You are too funny Marita.. I think we would have had a blast together as kids.
Loved it all, from the title to the last sentence. Well done!
This was a fun read, and when you mentioned the "sticker bushes" it took me back to my own childhood...I haven't heard that word in years. The interaction between the two girls seemed so real, that I'm guessing it is all true. Great job.