The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 1617 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
12/08/06
I enjoyed this – very different take on the subject of pastor. Good use of contrasts building up to a punchy finale. I did feel that there were too many flashbacks and on the first read through I had some difficulty in keeping track of whether I was reading of the past, present or future.
12/09/06
"...a hard stretch of love..." Now THAT's a great turn of phrase!
12/09/06
Good writing, good plot and good ending. Like the other reader, I found it difficult to follow timewise. I'll try and send you a revised version if I get a chance so you can see the difference.
12/10/06
Perhaps a foot note to say.. In a Not so distant future. It could very well be tomorrow.
12/10/06
Very good, true, honest, well communicated writing. I liked your opening as well. Not a big fan of dream stories, but you pulled it off wonderfully. Some masterful lines too. God bless.
Wonderful! Loved the flashbacks. When I was reading, I had the same thought you did - this could be next week! Scary.
12/12/06
Your language is so beautiful - it truly paints a portrait of your scene. Excellent detail as well - I truly enjoyed this.
Thanks for the hint in finding your article. I'm glad I did. I wonder how many are prepared for the times of persecution and hardship (not just having no money to pay for food or shelter but like those in your story, perhaps fleeing for their lives).

The bigger message is that when the Lord has given us a calling we do well to listen and obey. Thanks for sharing this and causing me to think more clearly.
I. too, liked the flashbacks and the story intriqued me
as I saw how it will be ! I also liked the setting ..somewhere, anywhere ..
different from New Jesery! I liked the western scenerio. Great job with this piece!
Leigh
Great story! Just a couple of minor grammar things, but well done.