The Official Writing Challenge
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Member
Date
07/28/06
Heart-pounding suspense--I totally understand how the mom felt. And the little girls acted exactly true to their ages.

I might have ended it one sentence earlier--that's where the "punch" is.

It's silly, but I found myself actually relieved that they were okay--the mark of a good piece of writing!
07/28/06
What a great ending. This is well written and holds attention well. Nicely done.