The Official Writing Challenge
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07/22/06
Very nice writing. I can't say I totally understand what it means. But, I will read it again after a little research. In the meantime, God Bless!
07/24/06
Interesting portrayal of body, soul & spirit. It was a little confusing; I felt I had to read it again to really get it. But the end wrapped it up nicely and made a good point. God bless!
07/24/06
I saw this as regret over lost potential and missed opportunities, yet in God we go on becoming like Him. Our physical desires for power, personal gratification, etc. impede the Holy Spirt in us. Only God knows when the time is right, and He always uses everything for our good and the good of others, fulfilling His perfect plan. The flesh is unwilling to let go, unlike the Spirt. A very interesting way of presenting our triune being. Her smile could have been one of victorious release, seeing she left her physical struggles behind. Good thought provoking read!
07/24/06
I would love to see this story grow into a novel. An intriguing and creative story.
07/24/06
This didn't confuse me--I really admired its creativity, and the ending was really cool. One question and one observation: why was her body represented as a man? And in the beginning, you use the word "commission" seven times in six sentences...re-work, perhaps?

I loved trying to figure this one out as I read, and it drew me in beautifully.
07/25/06
I'll be honest ... not quite sure I was able to follow this well, but then it might be just me. Being somewhat familiar with the Trilateral Commisson, I began thinking this was going to somehow have something to do with some conspiracy theory. Perhaps with more time you could have developed the story more. As your reader, I am feeling like I need more in order to draw a conclusion. God bless! :)
07/25/06
Glenn...you're back! Deep, intense thinking and all! I took this as an analogy of us as commissioners (as in, The Great Commission). We are commanded to go out and tell the good news - what opportunities have we missed? Or chosen to ignore? Hmmm. Much food for thought. Excellent writing for sure.
07/25/06
A bit confusing but well written. I don't understand the Trilateral Commission's role here.
07/25/06
great take on the body/soul/spirit view of life!
07/26/06
very creative. I did find it somewhat confusing. Also, watch out for repeating words and phrases. You have "light" twice in the first sentence and then say "the comission" many times. keep writing!
07/26/06
I'd like to say I understood every word to show my intelligence; but the truth is I'm lost somewhere between the pale woman, the "suit" and the "accent"... sorry! I'm sure this is a great story with a great message - as it is in Masters. Thank you for sharing, It WAS intriguing.