The Official Writing Challenge
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I am such a hopeless romantic. I actaully teared up at the end. This was so wonderful. Charming, sweet. The perfect love story. I was so glad that she told Luke no. Great message. Too many people marry because of pressure or thinking that no one else could love them. I sincerely love this piece. I soaked up every word. Wonderful job.
06/08/06
It's hard to write a story like this in 750 words when it could be a book, but you did a good job. I think I'd call this, "Can We Talk?" rather than your title, and I'd let readers know that Kris is a guy earlier in the story.
I like it. Fun read, and the surprise at the end was perfect. Thanks so much.

God bless,

Kevin
06/09/06
Ahhhhh. Such a nice piece. Well written with a great ending. Reminds me of when my husband pulled me aside many years ago with a similar confession. “It felt exactly like home.” Just as it should be—a warm place to rest one’s head. A great message for those who are looking for that special someone. Thanks for the memory.
Awww, sweet story.
06/09/06
Great story - really funny moments (I love Moose!), and I enjoyed the surprise - had to re-read it to check you haven't cheated! Good job.
06/12/06
Okay - the twist makes the story! Loved it! Woohoo ending! (I'm hoping this will eventually happen to my daughter and a 'friend' of hers - at least us mothers are hoping!) ;)
06/12/06
I enjoyed the twist ending. I didn't think Kris was a HE - but there are several he's with that spelling. Nicely done!
06/12/06
Teary eyed, and touched by this piece. Well done. I wondered if it would end this way and it did. I am a romantic too. Loved it! This was great!!
Loved the twist. Great story.
06/12/06
LOL - I enjoyed the surprise ending too - also went back and checked and re-read it in a different light!

Love the description of the old-lady-ness of Kris' house.

Still don't quite get the significance of Moose, the turtle. Figure it must be significant, since it's in the title and all.

Great writing, as always!
06/12/06
Jan, I loved the surpise ending. I didn't see it coming even after you wrote on the boards that your story had a surprise ending. Masterful, as usual.
06/12/06
I actually thought the surprise was going to be that Kris wanted to date Luke! (how soap operaish would that be??)
Yes, you did a great job on this one. I loved the way you kept some of the important details back for a pleasantly surprising ending.
06/12/06
Pass me a tissue please. One of my favorites! I agree with whoever said this could be a novel!
06/12/06
Jan, this is great! I love it! I am hopeless romantic and you drew me right in. I did try to figure out whether Kris was a boy or a girl, but it made sense in the end. I have a friend who married her chidhood friend and so I know it can happen. Your descriptions of the Luke's wooing and the rooms at Kris's house really drew me in. Fantastic!
Oh, Jan, I dearly love this piece! It's so 'real life' instead of the Hollywood hogwash that's pushed in every movie, every TV show. Thanks for writing about TRUE love and for writing it so masterfully!
I agree with everyone else, this is great. I wondered if Kris wasn't a boy, but I still enjoyed the ending. Very well done.
06/13/06
Wonderful writing, Jan! I love stories with twists and this one delivered. Nicely done!