Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: Purposefulness (Purpose in Life) (05/25/06)
TITLE: You're Weird!
By Sally Hanan
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That was my life – seventeen, alone even in a horde of humanity, and empty. I was some eccentric anagram, and I was supposed to figure who, or what, I was supposed to be.
The next few years were filled with my fingernails clawing my way to acceptance. Every time a hint of it came my way I would dig in and hold on. Invariably, those marked people fled as soon as they could pry their skin free! I wanted to matter. I wanted my life to count for something. I wanted them to see it, even if I could not…
It’s been 22 years since I was that unfulfilled, attention starved teenager. Many times I have done things to create an aura of purpose about my life, but they have been badly scripted monologues on an empty stage. Somehow screaming, “I AM special, I DO matter!” makes heads turn away. Go figure!!
Out of all that God has taught me, through my lame efforts, one memory stands out: the moment I let go of my selfish endeavors and chose to trust Him – it was then that God began to bless me with true substance.
Being purposeful is not about running like a crazy woman first in line at a sale, with our tongue hanging out and our hands waving vigorously in the air, striving toward what we think we need. It is not about wanting our lives to appear fulfilling to those around us. It’s about coming to His peaceful place of faith, with a heart that is set on Christ and His Kingdom. It’s about listening for His voice and obeying His whispers. It’s a beautiful, decisive place to be.
Those words that were branded into my head back then? I know the truth now:
I’m not weird …
I’m just wired …
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