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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Purposefulness (Purpose in Life) (05/25/06)

TITLE: You're Weird!
By Sally Hanan
06/01/06


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Youre weird, she said, as she swung her silky long hair out of the classroom - back to her friends. I sat at my desk, staring at the vacant space shed left behind. It rippled echoes back to my ears: Youre weird, weird, weird, weird, weird. I placed my head back down on the wooden graffiti and closed my eyes, not realizing how those words would haunt me for many years.

That was my life seventeen, alone even in a horde of humanity, and empty. I was some eccentric anagram, and I was supposed to figure who, or what, I was supposed to be.

The next few years were filled with my fingernails clawing my way to acceptance. Every time a hint of it came my way I would dig in and hold on. Invariably, those marked people fled as soon as they could pry their skin free! I wanted to matter. I wanted my life to count for something. I wanted them to see it, even if I could not

***

Its been 22 years since I was that unfulfilled, attention starved teenager. Many times I have done things to create an aura of purpose about my life, but they have been badly scripted monologues on an empty stage. Somehow screaming, I AM special, I DO matter! makes heads turn away. Go figure!!

Out of all that God has taught me, through my lame efforts, one memory stands out: the moment I let go of my selfish endeavors and chose to trust Him it was then that God began to bless me with true substance.

Being purposeful is not about running like a crazy woman first in line at a sale, with our tongue hanging out and our hands waving vigorously in the air, striving toward what we think we need. It is not about wanting our lives to appear fulfilling to those around us. Its about coming to His peaceful place of faith, with a heart that is set on Christ and His Kingdom. Its about listening for His voice and obeying His whispers. Its a beautiful, decisive place to be.

Those words that were branded into my head back then? I know the truth now:
Im not weird
Im just wired
Gods way.


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This article has been read 1083 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Amy Michelle Wiley 06/01/06
As Christians we are weird--set apart for God. Good job!
Rita Garcia06/02/06
Fantastic! Love the title, great ending!
James Clem 06/02/06
Tie in a scripture and I think this becomes a wonderful devotional!
Carla Feagans06/02/06
Oh, I loved this. Every bit of it. This was perfectly written, and such a wonderful message.

Thank you thank you thank you, excellent job!
Brenda Craig06/04/06
Wonderful, and inspiring. For me it spoke to the fact that what He thinks of us is the only thing that matters and when we accept that we are ok no matter what others think. It changes our focus from us to Him. Thanks for the reminder. It is all about Him
Jan Ackerson 06/04/06
I love the bits about prying their skin free, and badly scripted monologues...really great imagery.

I wonder if you should have stayed in 1st person for the whole thing? That would have avoided the "our tongue...our hands", which reads a bit awkwardly.

But most of all, I love this because I, too, am wired differently, and have felt like this almost all my life. You could have been writing my story, and you did it beautifully.
Ann Grover06/05/06
"I wanted them to see it, even if I could not"

Good insight... and the truth. Well written.
Debbie OConnor06/05/06
Great message. I relate too. Thanks!
Dr. Sharon Schuetz06/06/06
This is very good. So many of us can relate to it. Thank you.
Suzanne R06/07/06
You have some lovely descriptions. One of my favourites was: "...alone even in a horde of humanity, and empty."