The Official Writing Challenge
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The mother in your story sounds like quite a character! One suggestion, I think the verse you started with would be better at the end. That way it would wrap things up nicely (rather than making the reader feel like they are about to be preached to).
What a story. You wrote in beautifully, with such good timing. Your humour is fabulous. I loved the ending and the shout from the comotose mother. Great job!
05/13/06
I love your mom! Every church has a character like that, some good, some funny, and some downright dangerous. Some are all three! Anyways I love the ending because you definitely get the feeling that Brother Will was intimidated by her, but still feeling his oats that day. You also get the definite impression that he only survived due to the quick thinking of your dad. :>)

I really enjoyed reading about your mom. She sounds like she was quite a character. I agree about putting the Scripture at the end. It would bring it to a close, but your close was excellent. Good job.
05/18/06
What an excellent portrayal of your mother, interlaced with bits of humour. You captured the essence of her character very vividly and showed her strong will ready to defy Pastor Will before your father ushered her out.