The Official Writing Challenge
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04/27/06
What an interesting piece. I'd have liked you so expand it more. 'when Christ grabs and nails himself to the secular symbols of life and death' - love this phrase. Didn't entirely grasp the end, and your POV changed around a bit.
04/28/06
Phlegm? Perhaps I'm not getting it...or just too simple minded. Thank you for sharing.
04/29/06
There are glimmers of brilliance here, like gems buried in sand. Perhaps work on making your writing more accessible? Your way with words is unmistakable.
05/01/06
An interesting article, one that must be pondered through. You paint, if I understand you correctly, a sad but true picture of what our inner strength becomes: we compare ourselves to those around us, we soothe ourselves by thinking 'grace covers it all', and continue to live a lie. Is that what you were saying?
Now the technical things: If the opening line is a quotation, where can the reader find it? I don't recognize it.
"When you're a Christian, all things may be true or untrue." seems a bit awkward. Do you mean that when you are a Christian, there are no shades of truth, only true and false?
The next phrase, "The truist truism can be laid false with mindless, heartless repetition, the most secular song or poem can be inverted", is a gem. Like repeating a childhood Bible verse over and over but never applying the truth to the heart.
With a little more work, this piece could sear the conscience of one who is not passionate about the things of the Lord! PM me is I am wrong about your article; I am curious.
05/01/06
Ah... the idea of a luke warm church... very interesting ending line... well done. Should have finished the whole things out as a poem.