The Official Writing Challenge
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04/27/06
This sounds more like a tornado than a hurricane...but whatever, it's a great story of a miracle and God's love.
The above comment came from someone who has not lived through hurricanes. I have, and your story is believable. Especially a hurricane striking an island. It might have helped to have some explanation of why your character didn't get out of harm's way, but being on an island may be the explanation. I'm sure it isn't easy to evacuate.

I loved the overlay of scripture. A Christian enduring this event would certainly have it running through her mind, helping her endure.

Well done.
04/27/06
You really made me feel her terror and then relief. Well written
04/28/06
I really like the device of alternating Scripture with narrative. Very well done, but I found myself mildly distracted by hoping she got more clothing soon. Good job at capturing a terrible moment, and providing the hoped-for ending.
05/01/06
I too wanted her to find some clothing quickly!

Having gone through several hurricanes in the last two years, I know this can happen. Scientests have found unusual upwind gusts of powerful forces that can do just this. Scary!

Well done account of God's mercy in a devatating situation!
05/01/06
Very well done. I've lived through two hurricanes myself and you've captured the scenario realistically. Great writing!
05/01/06
Painted a vivid picture, I felt like I was there!
05/02/06
Awesome! You did a marvelous job of drawing me in and holding my attention until the very last word. Exceptional work.
Great job of putting the reader 'right there'! The scripture certainly gave a special dimension to the story too. Brings to mind our visit to the coast...so sad...but God is the source of inner strength, for sure.
05/03/06
Eighty-nine people, at this point in time, have now read that I have evidently not lived through a hurricane. Just for the record, I have been through over nine (9) hurricanes, growing up in Fla; but I still say this is a great piece of writing that shows God's great love, and that miracles do happen.
05/03/06
The writing is polished and well put together. I liked the scripture built in... but I think it threw off the pace of the story. The crisis is a mother who lost her child (and almost her life) during a violent hurricane. We didn't get to that meat until paragraph 5. That doesn't take away from the skill and wonderful artistic qualities of the opening or any other part ... just mentioning the construction of the piece as a whole. Great message, great skills, and a piece that should score well.
05/04/06
Another keepsake from one of my favorite faithwriters! Congratulations, Lynda! I like the way you portray the Christian walking with Jesus (in your words: "The prayer place in her mind, never abandoned at any time, gathered the tattered remains of her anxious thoughts...."). Certainly not a distraction from the story for me, rather it reveals that constant companionship that is our reality. "Underneath are the Everlasting Arms..." especially when hanging from a palm tree--yikes! Not a branch in sight!