The Official Writing Challenge
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You used a lot of good description, I felt like I could see the whole setting. I also love how you come up with such interesting names. :)

One typo: "It was obvious that this HAS once been..." should be HAD.

03/16/06
An intriguing and mysterious journey into a unique land of beauty and serenity. Lovely story that still holds it's mystery. Nicely written and held this reader's interest until the end. Well done.
What a terrific story. Beautifully written! You have soooo much talent!
03/16/06
You used great descriptions throughout, so I thought the last line was a bit weak -- "beginning of the discoveries" could have been written in a more descriptive way, adding symmetry to the story. Overall, I rate this A+ :)
03/16/06
This reads like the beginning of a full-length allegory. I like it.
Very visual. Your stories always have a certain flare.
Good job.
03/19/06
I like the mysterious and exotic feel to this. Am waiting to hear what happens next!