The Official Writing Challenge
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This is good. I like the idea of the phone call and the message over the machine. Good imagination.
A well-told story - a situation that could destroy a faith. One opinion: I would move paragraph 3&4 to the top and instantly grab the reader, and weave in the beginning just below it.
"God's audible voice, loud and clear, filled the hallway," ... was jolting. I might be reading this differently than you intended, but it would make a believer out of most anyone.
A bittersweet story well witten; and it has a great message. Thank you for sharing.
I agree - paragraphs 1 and 2 might even be unnecessary. Good, riviting article and I'm sure contains pains that parents of missing children go through all the time.
I think you did a marvelous job of showing the conflicting emotions that a mother would feel in such a situation. I did wonder about God's audible voice--that's such a rare occurance--maybe a more realistic scenario, more in tune with the rest of the story, would be God speaking to her heart? Or perhaps you were speaking any rate, this mother's heart really reached out to MaryEllen's. Good job.
So sad ... but well written. What an awful situation. It linked well with the concept of 'enter' - entering into peace. Good job.