Hire
Writers
Editors
Home Tour About Read What's New Help Join Faith
Writers
Forum
My Account Login
Shop
Save
Support
Book
Store
Learn
About
Jesus
  

Get Our Daily Devotional             Win A Publishing Package             Detailed Navigation

The HOME for Christian writers! The Home for Christian Writers!
The Official Writing Challenge

BACK TO
CHALLENGE
MAIN

INSTRUCTIONS

how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level

ENTRIES

submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners



Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.





TRUST JESUS TODAY

TRY THE TEST



Share
how it works   Submit

Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: End (02/13/06)

TITLE: Anna's Heart
By Julianne Jones
02/18/06


 LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE
 SEND A PRIVATE COMMENT
 ADD TO MY FAVORITES

It was his voice that told me what everyone had been afraid to say; his voice that gave it away before his words even registered.

Holding our daughter close to my face, his voice breaking, he told her, “Kiss your mama goodbye.”

Not goodnight, but goodbye.

So this was it. Too late now to change anything. It was over. Finished. The end.

Well, it certainly explained the look I’d seen in his eyes, the pain on my sisters’ faces. They all knew: had all known except for me. I’d been so blind.

Goodbye.

As my daughter’s soft skin pressed against my cheek, I breathed deeply of her baby sweetness and felt my heart breaking at this final kiss.

I tried to catch my husband’s eye, to communicate with this man I had pledged to love till the end. I wanted to reach up and drag his face down to mine but to do so would take more energy than I possessed.

His green eyes – those eyes I had fallen so madly in love with so many years ago – were now awash with tears as he bent to kiss me. When he straightened I felt his reluctance. After all we were one. Had been one. But now that was about to end.

“I love you,” I whispered.

He nodded. Everything had been said already. There was nothing left to say.

Settling our daughter more securely in his arms, he slung the nappy bag over his shoulder, and started toward the door.

“I’ll be back when Katie’s asleep.”

“No,” I managed to rasp. “Get some rest. I’ll see you in the morning.”

He looked ready to protest, then nodded.

“Okay. In the morning.”

One last look and then he was gone.

I closed my eyes, trying not to hear his voice, see his pain, or think about what everyone knew but hadn’t wanted to tell me.

It was finished.

My heart wouldn’t last much longer. It was giving up. The fight was almost over. The end would come soon.

Breathing a prayer, I closed my eyes and tried to sleep.

*********


The rattle of a trolley in the corridor woke me. Trying to ignore what seemed to be an unusual amount of activity just outside my door, I closed my eyes and willed sleep to come. When a nurse shone a torch in my face, I gave up.

“Anna? Are you awake?”

As if anyone could sleep with this racket going on!

Before I could answer she continued.

“A donor heart has become available. We’re going to get you ready for surgery.”

A heart. Emotions surged through my weakened body each vying for attention: elation, fear, joy, anxiety, and something unidentifiable.

A heart.

A chance.

Life.

“Call Shaun,” I whispered as tears rolled down my cheeks and I savored their saltiness.

“We’ve already rung your husband. He’s on his way.”

Shaun.

Katie.


I was going to live. I would get to see my baby grow, dance at her wedding, and hold her children. Shaun and I would be able to love together, argue together, live together, and grow old together.

A heart.

Suddenly pain so intense that it left me gasping for breath tore at my chest. I looked at the nurse in surprise, but she seemed unaware of the pain I was experiencing as she dutifully recorded pulse rate and temperature readings on her charts.

Fear clutched at my heart and I felt the room start to spin. I’m going to die. It’s too late. I’m not going to live to get my heart. I’m going to die. This must be the end.

Then it hit me. Someone had died that I might have a chance to live. Some family out there was grieving just as my family would have been grieving had the heart not become available. Someone had died for me. Someone I didn’t even know.

The tears fell more readily as the pain intensified.

I wasn’t going to die. Not yet. But someone else had and had left me a gift. A gift I didn’t deserve.

The door opened and I lifted my head expecting the doctor. Instead I looked into my husband’s face.

“Anna,” was all he said but there was love and hope and life in his voice.


The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
Accept Jesus as Your Lord and Savior Right Now - CLICK HERE
JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.


This article has been read 1442 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Kate Wells02/20/06
You made me feel as if I was in the room saying goodbye to Anna. This was very moving.
Crista Darr02/20/06
Lovely. Very well done.
Helen Paynter02/21/06
Brought tears to my eyes. Thank you.
James Clem 02/21/06
Wow, you gripped the reader so fast and just held on.
(For a second, I was afraid Shaun had died - cause he had just left.)
Good Job!
Phyllis Inniss 02/22/06
Great job. Very touching and well written.
Kevin Kindrick02/22/06
This was the second story today to bring me to tears. So powerful, and filled with so much hope. Thank you.

God bless,

Kevin
Cheryl Harrison 02/22/06
Very good. Gripping story with a powerful message. Thanks.
Pat Guy 02/23/06
Wow! I couldn't stop reading! You have the reader involved with each emotion - great job writing this!
Jan Ackerson 02/23/06
This is wonderful! Her musings about the stranger who died for her will take on a new meaning as she recovers, I think. Superb writing.
Lynda Schultz 02/23/06
I am a little slow. I got confused when Anna had the pain after receiving word that a donor heart was available. I assumed it was emotional pain, but it wasn't as clear as I needed it to be. But having said that little bit, this was a wonderful piece and you did a great job with it.
Cassie Memmer02/23/06
Beautiful. You had me right in there rooting for her. And yes, it is full of heart. Great writing!
Garnet Miller 02/23/06
Great job Jules! I was just about to sign off when I saw your hint. I couldn't leave without reading it. Very intense! I thought the baby was about to die. I was sad for the wrong person. I like the characters. I could feel the mother's pain. You did a good job. Bravo!!!
Anita Neuman02/23/06
Oh my word - I've read almost half of this week's entries and this is the only one that induced actual, wet tears. I was SO feeling her emotions all the way along. I just cannot imagine having my family say good-bye to me and not having the strength to grab them and hold them and express how much I love them. And then to be jolted back to the hope of life...man! I'm an absolute mess here.
Chris Clement02/24/06
Great job. Sadness, hope, realization. Emotional roller coaster. Excellent!
Shari Armstrong 02/25/06
Well done. Right now I have a friend waiting on a kidney transplant. The waiting and not knowing is the hard part, until you realize that once their is a chance, someone else is suffering that loss - excelent job portraying that.
Suzanne R02/27/06
Talk about a heart-full piece! Seriously - this was really touching. Well done!
Beth Muehlhausen02/27/06
Great job - very involving. Loved the step-by-step progression of her thoughts. I was right there witnessing every breath!!

I have a friend who has endured not one, but two heart transplants - 11 years apart. She is an awesome witness to the power of God'stransformation in human life. Her spirit soars above the din of human pain - truly remarkable.
B Brenton04/14/06
Oh, Jules. This was beautiful. So sad. So weepy.
I still love your stuff.
Val Clark05/17/06
Masterful, you nearly had me there - I was sure she'd die. Wonderful protrayal of characters, and their love so clearly drawn.