The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
03/18/17
A sweet story that I enjoyed and followed easily. The things that dreams are made of.

Red ink just because we are suppose to look. I would say you could have tightened the first sentence easily example: She cocked her heard toward the sound.
03/19/17
Very cute and heartwarming, A dream came true. A good storyline. I would have moved the large paragraph after the leaving at twelve. I think would have added more suspense. I would also have added more dialogue in that paragraph. Good Job. Keep plugging away and I will keep reading. God bless.