The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 402 times
Member Comments
Outstanding! Great writing. The setting was felt as was the character development. This is a winner. it would be hard for many of the elite christian sect to accept this poor rough soul's conversion. I will be watching for future writing.
Beautiful, heart-warming story. Well done. A reminder not to judge on outward appearance.
Wonderful story. Love the "accent" of the characters.
I enjoyed the flow of the story and the characters you created. Well done.
Great stuff. Certainly put Mazie and Gertie in their place!
I was right there in the funeral service sitting alongside your great characters. Wonderful story with a powerful message.
I loved this story of the stranger who testified for Jesus. The dialogue was spot on. He could have been from my neck of the woods!

Very well written and really great job!
A wonderful wonderful story beautifully told - surely 'Amazing Grace' could not be sung in more appropriate heartfelt circumstances. This was a God-glorifying delight to read. Thankyou.
What an awesome story! The dialogue between characters made it very real. I loved the "tough guy." Well done!
I love everything about this piece, the characters, the names of the characters the backstory that Tuffy tells. Just a great, great job.

One little bit of red ink, and something I've learned as a scriptwriter in the past. Be sure to remain consistent in your character's dialogue. Tuffy's previous dialogue didn't seem to indicate that he would say something like " the depths of unconsciousness" as much as he'd say "even when I weren't awake". :)

But that is extremely nit-picky and a very minor item in an otherwise excellent piece.

Thanks for sharing it with us.
What a great and touching story. Your outline of the characters was very convincing and this could be a good theatre setting. I admire the way you hinted at the big, burly guy at the beginning and his important role in the story.
Wonderful story that seemed to unfold right in front of me. Your dialog is great! The topic is displayed with creativity and your point is made clear from the most unexpected source.

Have to say, this is my favorite this week. Thanks for sharing.
This was an excellent story told with great skill. You did a great job of developing the characters and I loved the fact that Gertie talked just as loud as her sister, while telling her to hush.

My red ink is to draw attention to the first, very long sentence. As a hook it would work better if it was punctuated a little differently and a few words chopped...

This wasn’t the first gravesite service held on the hill overlooking the Reynolds’ homestead. Nor would it be the last. But it would be the most memorable.

Of course, this is only my opinion and many obviously found no problem here.

I loved the dialog (but do agree with Joe above) and felt you did a great job of bringing everyone to life.


Tender and poignant slice of life. I really liked it.

“You’d think that someone would have the courtesy to die in the spring or fall for a change..." is such an attention getter sentence. I would start with that.

Great job:)
I absolutely adored the way you crafted this tale.

Great piece of storytelling, it lifted my spirits, put a smile on my face, and energized me to throw a few more bricks!
Poignant, clever, disarmingly witty and what an ending! Love this!
Wonderful story. I like the way the telling of the family members wishing he had died in cooler time of year accentuated the love the stranger had for him.
Echoing everyone's statements including my own, one word "epic!"

A winner!

God bless~
Since we've already thrown bricks and folks know this is my story...I just wanted to express my appreciation and gratitude to everyone for their words of encouragement and for the red ink. You have blessed my socks off. I'm thankful to the Lord for leading me to this site and for His anointing, inspiration, illumination, and direction. I can't (and don't want to) write without His input and anointing. Again, thank you for your kindness. God is Good!

God bless~
Congratulations on ranking 4th in your level and 22 overall.