Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: First World Problem (04/17/14)
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TITLE: �Yea, Hath GOD Said?� He Purred. "No Problemo." | Previous Challenge Entry
By Judith Gayle Smith-Owens Vitouswykegardinerclark
04/24/14 -
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This ravishing Queen Bee is a unique eBay treasure, with brown, gold, and crystal rhinestones gracing every inch of her.
Subtle striping, little black eyes, glorious wings spread to cover two ring fingers, too cute and very tempting.
And it is a glorious ring watch – happy discovery indeed, as my present ring watch runs erratic sporadically, a silent shrieking annoyance rather than the convenience it was fashioned to be.
Buzzing back to the Queen Bee – the more I google-eyed, obsessively Googled her, the more I coveted, desired, and almost idolized her. Interesting words, idolize and covet.
She was bargain priced at only six dollars, an additional four dollars shipping from Thailand. Oh, I do love irresistible beauties, priced to match my Social Security income. It took over a month for her to tediously, laboriously wing her way to far-off America to wearily thump into my mailbox.
The thrill of opening that foreign-stamped package, breathlessly awaiting the coveted watch-ring, was eclipsed by the beauty afire in my moist palm.
It was enormous, much larger than I had anticipated. And it was heavy, and totally “bling.”
I proudly wore it for a hectic week; continually flashing it, basking in the glow of compliments regarding my unique “fashion sense.”
I began to see little holes where rhinestones had been. The gold turned to copper and my ring finger turned an ugly grey-green, after only one week of wear.
I sent a message to the seller when the bee cover itself fell off, taking with it the endearing persona that had lurched into my eagerly grasping heart.
My wee idol is now broken into many unrealizable pieces, “Humpty Dumpty Redux”. But the yolk is on me.
Eureka. I craft jewelry – I will make something exquisite from this tragic mess. So beautiful and expressive it will elicit many appreciative squeals and therefore sales – using the lust of the eyes to fill the coffers.
The wings are still good, as is the working watch. I will make a joyous “flutterby” with paste jewels and fanciful glittering, using only glue, wire, gold beads . . .
I, reworking this monstrosity daily, seeing hateful flaws each time, find my admiration for this miserable chunk of colorful pot-metal dwindling to a ridiculous obsession that grasps my attention and my time away from my family and away from my Lord.
“Yea hath God said?” wheedled the serpent, the epitome of God’s creation, the very exquisiteness of desirability, the “covering angel”, totally different from what he became due to his tempting Eve to sin against God.
How did this suddenly become about Adam and Eve in The Garden of Eden? Some qualify this as a myth. To them I say mythtake on their part.
Satan carries on his unholy business of tempting unwary souls susceptible to his pleadings. It doesn’t have to be a rosy apple or a shining gold calf.
We’re warned to resist Satan’s idols, the wondrous works of our creativity. I fell into Satan’s scheme without even a shudder of horror. I coveted, I spent more time with this “object d’art” fancifully farcical idiotic “treasure” than with my Lord. I hear Satan’s cackling laugh deforming my heart.
Whatever Satan uses to tempt us from God is dependent upon our willingness to be tempted. Whether a sparkling bauble, or the not-so-humble works of our hands accomplishing reasonable service.
This is the first problem the world had to confront – whether it be the desire to disobey our Creator by serving ourselves, or the satisfaction of doing only that which is required of us.
I must stop jingling my bells on street corners, importantly imposing my considerable bulk to replace someone more worthy than me at His Table.
Had I been seated with the Disciples when they questioned who the deceiver would be, Leonardo d’ Vinci would have depicted me seated upon our Lord’s lap, staring owlishly, with great fascination at the bejeweled ring conspicuously flashing in the Disciples eyes.
Guess whose triumph that would be. Satan busily distracts us from God. This is why God had to give us His Ten Commandments – to prove us, whether or not we would willingly obey Him.
I easily broke the first four Commands of God – unthinkingly, yes. I dabbled with coveting, pride and self-aggrandizement. Who do I love most? When we allow ourselves to fall not-so-helplessly into Satan’s unholy game of self-deception, only Satan wins.
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http://www.kjvbible.org/satan.html
Exodus 20 KJV
http://av1611.com/kjbp/kjv-dictionary/idolatry.html
http://www.kingjamesbibleonline.org/Genesis-Chapter-3/
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Powerfully executed.
God bless~
But I will say what I experienced in reading this piece. First, I think the message is excellent and your ending point is perfect. But along the way, I found my attention wandering from the text. It just seemed to meander around too much for me. When you delivered the line "when did this become about Adam and Eve?" (or something like that), I found myself in agreement.
As I said it's a great message, and you do tie everything together in the end, but you lost me somewhere along the way. Maybe it's just my own attention span, but I think it could use a little more focus or tightening up in the middle sections.
Feel free to ignore me, though, because I most likely don't know what I'm talking about. :)
I think there were a few places where you used three or four words of description where one might have sufficed, but I think this may be part of your voice, so although you could probably tighten up the writing, please don't change your own unique voice to conform to something anyone else says.
On the whole, great job!