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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: Chillax (04/03/14)

TITLE: Relentless Confusion
By Judy Sauer


Relentless Confusion

Carolís day is humming along smoothly like a fresh scent of spring air until all

Hues of confusion break loose. What just happened? How? Why?

I just donít understand are the words that sprint viciously through Carolís thoughts.

Little does Carol recall that she is under constant surveillance especially in times like this.

Life is full of surprises: outcomes vary the continuum between big-winning greats and repulsive as ash in the mouth.

Reality has its own surprises yet most are not like winning the blue ribbon prize in the county fair pie eating contest.

Even though answers are not forthcoming to Carol, she knows her true source of strength.

Like the multitudes of believers, Carol has a healthy faith and trust in God and His plan.

Away from her sight line, the one who continues the covert watch over Carol is on the job.

X does not mark the spot of where this one can be found. But where? Will the identity ever be recognized?

Pulling a pint of her favored frozen yummy comfort food from the ice box is unusual for Carol but today she succumbs.

Every now and then Carol will lose her commitment to not fall for the evil oneís trickery that leads her emotionally astray.

Ask any woman if they can relate and you will hear a loud collective clang of agreement screeching YES!!!

Carolís mind streams a constant reel of the dayís events as they unfolded. She cannot escape this non-stop movie.

Each agonizing millisecond of detail replays relentlessly in her overwhelmed mind as she mindlessly consumes ice cream.

Questions, as if shot in rapid fire succession by a ferocious trial lawyer, on the what, how, and why leave her baffled

Until Carol obtains a piece of sanity to grab her journal and talk it out with God. This is where true comfort is found.

In the stillness of her silent prayer for good orderly direction, the pen scurries across the parchment as God writes:

Even in your questioning dear daughter you do not find the answers. You have chosen the better path by coming to me.

There are times in life when things will never make sense to you. However to me they complete part of my grand plan.

Rest in my presence and find peace in not knowing. Answers may never be unveiled. All I ask is that you be still with me.

Each day unfolds just as I have planned. Today is no different. Even in your relentless confusion you can find rest in me.

Something to always remember is the Holy Spirit is constantly watching over you, keeping you from harm. Heís on the job all the time.

Thank you for spending time in my presence precious one. Just chill and relax. Be at peace. Know quiet, and rest in me.
Love God

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This article has been read 158 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Gary Ritter 04/10/14
I've had the opinion for a long time that good short story writers are truly clever (how I find myself now writing some is another story and certainly doesn't put me in that category). I think in addition that writers who come up with interesting approaches to a story outside the normal way of writing a story certainly fall into the "clever" camp. I liked the way you put this together.
CD Swanson 04/11/14
Beautiful sentiments toward the end...nicely done.

God bless~
Joe Moreland04/13/14
It is hard to imagine another entry embodying the meaning of chillax better than this.

I love your approach. This was such an easy read. It was almost more like poetry than a short story. Just a great job.

Brenda Rice 04/14/14
Very creative and interesting read. Thanks for sharing.
Toni Hammer 04/14/14
Once again, the most unquote entry I've seen this week. I love that you so often think outside the box.

You made me want to talk to God and eat ice cream. :)
Bea Edwards 04/14/14
I think your distinctive approach nailed it!

Pleasurable and philosophical to ponder.
George Parler 04/14/14
Nice! Great writing as well as unique structure.

Years ago I recorded an instrumental CD project in which no one ever noticed that the track titles, when read together, was a prayer.

Well done.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 04/18/14
I like your out-of-the-box thinking on this. Usually I don't see this except in poems. You definitely covered the topic and delivered the message. I did notice a lot of little errors like missing commas or quotation marks. While I admire your creativity, for me, I think your message might have worked better in an actual story so the reader could really get to know your character. A story would allow her to open the freezer door, sigh, shut it,and walk away. Spin around, then she opens it a crack, peeks in, while glancing around to see if anyone was watching before grabbing the ice cream. Those few lines could really give insight into the MC's personality and emotional state. I'm not saying one way is better than the other, but just giving you my personal opinion. You did do a wonderful job with adding the peace. I think that is missing from Chillax and you made that so clear for me. It brought a tear to my eye. Sometimes I o just need to relax, but I always need the peace you wrote of. It touched my heart at the perfect time and after all that's what writing for Christ does and you did nail that! Congratulations on ranking 8th in your level. The highest rankings can be found in the message boards. Happy Dace!