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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 – Advanced)
Topic: The Deep End (03/06/14)

TITLE: Plink
By Rachel Malcolm
03/12/14


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A stone drops. It plinks in the water and leaves tiny ripples that are swallowed by the next wave. Steadily sinking, the stone enters the darkness of the abyss. The water is frigid here—the pressure suffocating.

Creatures blind and grotesque guard these forgotten waters. In blackness inconceivable, the stone silently hits bottom, and an invisible cloud of silt rises. The stone—small, round, and indistinguishable save for its smoothness—remains forever lost.

~


When did I begin to sink? As a little girl shattered by a family divided? Yes, that's when I let the bitterness stretch it's arms around my soul.

Still sinking, the light faded from view as I realized God and evolution cannot coexist. There is no God, I lied to myself. In that vacuum where God was figment, sin ceased to be. I plunged through bitter cold into the darkness of drugs and promiscuity.

I sought to fill the void where God had reigned by embracing the occult. Candles burning, I chanted incantations that joined me to witches throughout time. I couldn't see the gnashing creatures that swam circles around me.

Choosing to deny my God did nothing to deliver me from the wretched chains of guilt. Self-inflicted wound oozing, I wrote in my diary, “She punishes herself and bleeds.” Striking bottom, I sought death.

How could light reach through fathoms of water darker than blindness? And yet the light of hope pierced through and made me want to live. I should have been that stone lost forever—save for love so powerful it conquered death.

~


I am on a boat, the Fisherman with me. A stone falls into the water—plinking. “Go after her,” says the Master.


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This article has been read 308 times
Member Comments
Member Date
Camille (C D) Swanson 03/13/14
My goodness, what a powerful entry. Filled with messages and inspiration.

Nicely done.

God bless you~
Noel Mitaxa 03/15/14
Your title intrigued me as a new word (to me,) for it sounded so innocent and light - such a contrast to the painful details of your story. In this sense it typifies the deceptive innocence of our enemy's wiles, which you have described so well.
Danielle King 03/15/14
This is so deep and powerful. A short piece that speaks volumes. Great writing. Plink.
Verna Cole Mitchell 03/18/14
I like how you demonstrated the way God's love reaches out to us when we feel like we are sinking. Your comparison of the sinking stone was excellent.

One red-ink note: "it's" always means "it is." The possessive does not have an apostrophe.
Dusty Fontaine03/18/14
Rachel,
Very nice job on this entry. It is simple yet "deep."

I love how you took us from the sinking stone to the sinking life. Though the stone may be lost forever in the deep, God is able to reach us in the deepest, darkest times of our lives.

You said in your brick throw you didn't know about your entry this week, but I think it is brilliant and a possible winner.

Loved it!
Dusty
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 03/19/14
Wow, I don't even have words wow! The opening was a touch of brilliance. To make me relate to a stone is pure genius. I felt like you could have been writing my story, that you somehow opened my brain and scooped it out. I marvel in God's goodness and your obedience to him. He knew I needed to read this at this precise moment in time. It could have been chock full of errors, and I wouldn't have noticed since the Holy Spirit was blocking all distractions from my mind so that I would totally focus on your message. I have no words, but tears, plenty of tears. You rocked my world with your words and Jesus took me off of the floor and cradled me in his arms. This is for sure one of my all-time favorites.
Wilma Schlegel 03/19/14
This was great! I could feel the cold, see the grotesque. Great back and forth between real and symbolic. Loved your ending.
Toni Hammer 03/20/14
Congratulations!!! <3
Wendy B McLain 03/20/14
Wow! The imagery in this writing is astounding. A powerful message. I can see why it was and EC pick for sure.

Congratulations!

God bless~
Dusty Fontaine03/20/14
Congratulations, Rachel.

It was an incredible visual and deserved to win!!!

Dusty
Judy Sauer 03/20/14
Congratulations on 1st place.
Judy Sauer 03/20/14
Congratulations on Editor's Choice 8th place. Quite an accomplishment.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 03/20/14
Congratulations!!!!!!!!! HAPPY HAPPY DANCE!!!!! I really loved this piece.
Lillian Rhoades 03/21/14
Just read your entry Rachel.
Few words, but powerful! A hearty CONGRATULATIONS! Well deserved. :-)
Camille (C D) Swanson 04/03/14
Congrats!
God bless~