The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 549 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
A thoughtful well presented devotion. Excellent.
01/09/14
Great story! No matter how bad we think things are going for us, we have only to look around to see someone worse off. Some of our worst moments make us truly appreciate our better times! Well done!
01/10/14
I’d love to have your input into the free writing lessons available on the FaithWriters forums. This week’s lesson is on writing devotionals, and next week will cover writing on topic for the weekly challenge. Look for it at http://www.faithwriters.com/Boards/phpBB2/viewforum.php?f=67, or if you’re on Facebook, you can “like” Faithwriters Writing Lessons.
01/11/14
Oh my! This gave me chills...an excellent message for all. Appreciate all things and in all things give thanks.

Well done.

God bless~
You did a grand job with this piece. The setting was so real, I could almost smell the vomit on the floor. You also gave a chilling picture of life with a "special needs" child. You managed to balance the roller coaster of a mom's love, fears, and frustrations. The only red ink is when the son talks near the end. I had to reread the sentence because I thought it was the son's voice not the mom's. If you had started a new paragraph I think it would have helped. That's a tiny thing though and over all you did a splendid job of bringing the characters to life and my heart ached for them all. The British phrases made it even better and more authentic in my eyes. I know some authors try to change the UK words or spellings, but I'm so glad you stayed true to yourself; it added character to the story.
01/11/14
This is a well-written story and pictures well a typical Emergency Department (unfortunately!). The sobering ending is very thought provoking. One small error I noted was "the relative’s room", which confused me as to what it meant. I assume you meant "the relatives' room" - a room where relatives wait. Well done with this.
I was engaged in this story from beginning to end.
Quite a story! Thank you for taking us with you . . .
01/12/14
This flows with a lot of energy. Your sad ending caught me by surprise (which was good). Then I completely understood the mother's feeling. Nice work!
01/12/14
This is an exceptionally fine story. One with an exceptionally fine and strong message to all. At the end of the day, we have so much to be thankful for. Very well done!

As I will be moving up to Masters next week. (I was told I was supposed to) I see I have my work cut out for me. So many fine writers here. Blessings....
01/12/14
An exceptional devotional. I loved the sudden change in emphasis at the end. A mum telling her story suddenly becomes an offering of praise and an open invitation to all.

Blessings, Graham.
01/13/14
This is an amazing piece - I've just re-read it and its even better, the second time round! I feel I have been on an emotion roller coaster! I love your humour in the early paragraphs - you had me smiling, sympathising, empathising, remembering - and grinning! I believe I've come across those blue plastic chairs!! After quickly bypassing the regurgitated curry (as you also did!), I was drawn up sharp when I realised where you were heading - 'she doesn't get to drive her son home tonight'. Wow - memories of a similar time started to pour in. Then your wonderful timely challenge at the end. Thank you Dee- this was just great.
01/15/14
Wow-what I assumed would be a continuation of the comical thread soon turned profound. Nicely done!
01/16/14
Congratulations!

God bless~
I wondered if this was yours. I loved it. Happy Dance!
01/16/14
Great depiction of the emergency room. Congratulations on your placing!
01/17/14
Am so thrilled this placed Dee, thanks again for such a great read and many congratulations.
01/17/14
Your story is very thought-provoking and certainly packs a punch at the end. Yes, in all things we need to be grateful. Congrats on placing 10th in the EC list with this most deserving entry.