The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
08/22/13
Wow- I was on the edge of my seat. This held my attention and I didn't exhale until the last word.

Nicely done! God bless~
08/23/13
I love the first half of this--your word choice and powerful writing really helped to give your readers a sense of what your character's terror must have been like.

In the second half, the dialog between the two characters is uninterrupted by any action or narrative, and my interest flagged a bit.

Your writing skills are fine, and this is one of the more creative approaches to this topic that I've read.