The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Good descriptive writing. I liked the way you used the boy's actions-kicking clods, thumping berries, taking a portray his character. Your title also goes well with this boy--sounds like a few boys I know! One suggestion: in the pargraph where the boy is coming home and sees his dad in the yard working you tell us he approached. I don't think you really needed to tell the reader that he approached. You were doing a good job showing his approach, telling us that he approached somehow just doesn't fit. Like the dialogue too--very realistic.
Delightful slice of life piece. Enjoyed all the details.
This was piece held my attention from beginning to end. It had action, adventure, and numerous moments that spelled out
L I F E...Great job.

God bless~