The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 495 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
04/11/13
Oh wow what a powerful story. I can feel the pain of the MC oozing off the page. Your descriptions are priceless and such a perfect fit. I thought the comparison between the womb and underwater genius. You spoke volumes in this piece and it really touched my heart.
04/12/13
This is a moving piece of writing that rings true. I like the ending. Well done.
04/12/13
Very descriptive. I like the line: I feel enshrouded in a cocoon, escaping for a moment from the elements of my environment--protected, sustained, like a baby in a womb.

The story rings true; the circumstances remain the same, yet Christ's love is evident.
04/12/13
Beautifully written emotion and visuals that makes the reader feel immersed in the MCís feelings and actions. And love the messageó focusing on Jesus, doesnít always change our circumstance, but it does change our perspective and ability to handle it! Terrific job on this!
04/13/13
Wow! This article was so descriptive, I felt like I was right there.

Sometimes you need to get away from the stresses of life and be alone with our Savior. This story tells how in the quiet He comes to us.

Again, excellent writing!
04/13/13
I really, really loved this! The weight of her circumstances is palpable and so relatable. Yet, it ends with the fresh breeze that we all need, Jesus. Beautiful!
04/13/13
Graphic and gripping. You immersed us in the MC's world. Well done. Feels like you wrote it word by word as it happened to you.
04/14/13
I see why you are in the Masters category. You really made me feel as if this was happening to me.
04/14/13
I felt your emotional pain and frustration with this stage of your life but was encouraged by your focus in the end of that which brings peace, Jesus.

This was a beautiful story.
04/15/13
Great descriptive writing! I certainly don't live in the city or the desert, nor do I swim, but felt I was right there with you. I do have a question about the word shirk. I think it means to avoid work. Would "Soon I shed the towel" have been a better choice?
04/17/13
You make diving a healing thing, rather than something to fear. I may have to brave up and get in the swim again!
04/17/13
I felt as if I was watching a movie in my head, so great was your descriptions. This was an easy read, I liked it so much.

God bless~
04/18/13
Pain and Hope! Life is such a struggle. Your writing was beautiful. I so enjoyed your descriptions of the desert. I could see it all.
04/18/13
Congratulations on ranking 8th in your level and 11 overall!