SETTING: A conference room
PROPS: A stack of papers. They don't actually have to say anything, but depending on how close the audience will be sitting, some type of letterhead might be a good idea.
A sign with the company name [optional]
Trash can [optional]
COSTUMES: Normal business clothes
*optional* Others could be sitting around the table also, even if they do not have speaking lines. Most should be goofing off... making paper airplanes, sleeping, trying to throw balls of paper into a trashcan, etc.
Allen (Holding the stack of papers): Okay. Let's bring this staff meeting for 'Unique Staff Crafting Services' to order. We've got a lot of orders for custom staffs this time, and we've got a lot of really unique requests. It's going to take all of us working together to get these done in time. Justin and Kevin, I especially need your help. Take a look and let me know what you think.
(Allen tosses most of the papers on to the table, but keeps some for himself. Justin and Kevin each grab some of the papers.)
Justin: Okay. Here's one. Under "Special Instructions" it says "Should turn into a serpent on command, when thrown to the ground, then back into a staff when lifted by it's tail."
Kevin: (looks at Justin) Um... what? Did you read that right, Justin? How is that even possible? (looks to Allen) Allen, as supervisor, I think you need to take this one...
Allen: Actually, I'll get some of our tech staff to take a look at it. Maybe we can figure something out.
(Justin shrugs and hands the paper back to Allen.)
Allen: Kevin, read that first one you have there.
Kevin: Okay. This one says "Must be able to spontaneously bud, blossom, and produce almonds."
Allen: Don't you mean "spontaneously combust?"
Kevin: Nope. It says "spontaneously bud."
Justin: I'm pretty sure spontaneous combustion would be more likely... What does spontaneous combustion have to do with producing almonds, anyway?
Kevin: I don't know, okay? But maybe if we found the right type of branch and planted it in a large pot of soil and sent it to him that way...
Allen: Then it would cease to be a staff. Nor would the budding be spontaneous.
Kevin: This is true. But it's the best idea I've got. Who does this guy think we are, anyway?
Allen: This one says "should be strong enough to kill a lion and bear... and comforting."
Justin: So... he wants a staff that turns into a high powered rifle?
Allen: Well, I once heard about this guy named David who killed a lion by grabbing it by it's beard, so... wait. Hold on. (looks closely at paper) Same guy. Never mind.
Kevin: So he just wants a regular staff, but perhaps a bit sturdier and wider? I mean, if he can kill a lion by grabbing it by it's beard, certainly the staff doesn't have to be so special.
Justin: Yeah, but still... how can a staff be comforting?
Allen: Well, I'd say any staff that could kill a lion and bear would be pretty comforting.
Justin: Valid point. I'll take that one! ( Justin snatches the paper out of Allen's hands.)
Kevin: Sure. Take the easy one. Leave me with the budding staff. Thanks a lot. I appreciate it.
Justin: No problem.
Kevin: This one says "One worthy of the Messiah"
Allen: Uh... just who does this guy think we are? God?
Justin: But... that's impossible!
(Kevin and Justin look at each other, then throw their papers in the air.)
Kevin and Justin: We quit!
Author's Note: Yes. The first two staffs actually belong to the same person. I had forgotten this as I was writing. So... maybe Aaron anticipated needing a back-up staff. :)
Exodus 7:9 (NASB)
Numbers 17:8 (NIV)
I Samuel 17:34-36 (NASB)
Psalm 23:4 (NASB)
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